Episode Transcript
Hello. My name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorced mother. She is really my superhero.
That's why it's important for me to support women to share their uniqueness, their personalities,
perspectives, and emotions about life. Too many women in this world feel alone. They
worry about the judgment of others and they struggle with their mental health, but when
they listen to the rare girls podcasts where empowered women share their voices and tell
their stories, many women will feel inspired to live a life of freedom and to overcome
all insecurities they will feel it is a safe space to find their confidence to remember
their unique beauty and to feel their self-worth and they will connect with the sisterhood of rare girls who
encourage their success and support their dreams.
That's what this podcast is all about. My guest today is Alina Sudhir.
Alina is a final year fashion design student
originally from Kerala, India who lived her whole life in Dubai.
Her hobbies are drawing,
poetry, dancing, and sports.
She used to play football, basketball,
and she did athletics in school now.
She does occasionally model.
Alina, how are you today?
I'm good, I'm so good, how are you?
I feel positive, blessed,
very, very happy to talk to you today.
I'm very curious about you as a woman and as a person.
So I'll begin with this nice first question,
which is, Alina, if your friends and the people
who know you best could describe your personality,
what would they say about you?
I'll tell you, when someone sees me first,
they tell me that I have a resting bitch face.
So they tend to judge me saying that,
oh, she might be rude, but once they get to know me,
they're like, you're actually crazy.
So I have this thing, when I'm close to people,
I annoy them a lot.
And for me personally, I'd say I'm really hardworking and I'm more of a family person.
I might look a little tough on the outside, but I'm really, really soft hearted.
Thank you.
So when people first meet you, they see that you have a bitch face.
They think you're hard on the outside, but when they get to know you, they feel
and understand one, you're crazy, you annoy them a little bit and you're soft
and family oriented.
Correct?
Yes.
And let's explore this a bit more. Your crazy side. There are many women who might have that
crazy side within them, but they keep it confined. They keep it reserved because they worry about
the judgment of other people. Did you deal with this? Are you dealing with this? What's
your perspective on it? And how can women feel more empowered to be free to show their
real self and their crazy self without any worry of the judgment of anyone.
Honestly, I think it's a personal preference to an extent.
Like, many people go through a lot and some people, they're just comfortable around everyone
and some they're not. So, just, you know, if you're comfortable with talking to everyone,
just talk. That's what I would say. But I don't think it's like just women, you know,
I don't know how to explain it really.
Like, I think if you feel okay,
and I think the other person also matters in that sense.
So like, when I met you, like when I'm talking to you,
I feel comfortable talking to you.
Yes.
So it's like that.
I love that.
And I want to know more.
There are some people in this world that you might meet
and you feel instant connection and chemistry with.
Like, you're almost like you met them before,
you know them all your life.
And some people, they can be great, but you never feel a match.
There is like a wall between you and such people.
One, how do you explain that?
Do you have any thoughts about that?
And secondarily, do you think that's the right way or for you, is it a criteria
for you to choose this is my kind of person and this is not, or how when you
meet someone new, does one elevate and become part of your inner circle or not?
For me, if I feel comfortable with them, I get very close to them, but I don't think like,
oh, you are perfect for me or you are okay to be my friend. I don't judge people like that.
How they are with me, I stay like that with them.
I understand. And you said when you're comfortable with people,
you show them your crazy side. Can you explain a bit more? What does that mean?
Crazy side, does it mean you're adventurous and you love to take risks?
Does it mean that you joke in crazy ways? Does it mean you dance in the rain although there is none
in Dubai? What does it mean to you to have your crazy side? My crazy side is actually me jumping
and dancing around a lot and not many people get to see the inner child I would say. My mom says
to other people I look really mature but I don't really show my childish little me behavior
to everyone. So I have these facial expressions that I make since I was a child, and not many
people get to see that. So yeah.
What do you love most about your childish, crazy side? Is it that you feel youthful,
like without any problems and responsibilities, like a little girl protected and happy? Is
it that you feel free and you can do whatever you want, like that childhood carefree attitude?
Is it more about the energy that you have so much energy and you want just to let it out so that you feel almost like you have more energy by giving more to the world?
Or what is the most exciting part about that part of you?
I think the most exciting part is that I get to be myself.
And as much as I want to say that people don't judge, they do. They do judge a lot.
And most of the time I used to care so much like before I was such a people pleaser, so I used to care so much about what others thought about me and I've learned that it's actually very pointless to think about what others think about you because people always have their opinion.
Some like you someday don't.
So I just, you know, be myself with everyone.
And if they like me for who I am,
they'll be friends with me.
If not, they can leave my life, it's completely okay.
And it's just that I feel safe around certain people.
No, I just get more comfortable with certain people
so I be myself.
You spoke about comfort, about feeling safe
in order to open up a lot.
Did you struggle with anxiety and worry and overthinking
and therefore that was the reason that you were for a while or even till now that you catastrophized
that's how in psychology it's called that you think about the worst case scenario what could happen
and all that and how did you progress on it what's your advice to other women who might worry
a lot and have real anxiety so that they will break free i do overthink a lot in my life i've
And it's not something I still feel
very comfortable talking about
because of how people would see it.
For me personally, I cannot speak about every one's self.
For me, I started writing poetry.
Like I used to have this really weird thoughts.
It got really out of control.
Like it was to a point that I couldn't control.
So, and I'm the kind of person
who don't really talk about my problems to people.
So I started writing, like, if you read my poems, it's all really sad.
I usually write when I'm sad.
So that really helped me because it was like I couldn't talk to anyone.
I didn't really feel comfortable around anyone.
I didn't really trust people.
So writing really helped me and so did dancing and sports, like, you know, you
have that anger in you and you can just throw it out.
So I think to all the women out there, I just say find something that you feel comfortable doing that makes you feel safe, so that you don't just bottle all those emotions up, you somehow let it out, even though you can't talk to people.
Great. And it makes me wonder, why did you choose fashion design, since that's what you study, is it part of it?
expressing yourself, you said you love comfort,
you focus on comfort when creating different outfits.
How does it work?
How does it relate?
Is it part of self-expression?
Is it that you can escape through your outfit
and be different people, different women,
different personas?
Tell me more about that.
I actually got into fashion
because my mom's side of the family,
they're all into fashion.
So I've seen these women in my family.
They were amazing.
there's a really strong independent woman and I've seen them growing up and I
really wanted to do you know you know how you like draw these designs but then
it's really hard to make them happen so I wanted to challenge myself to like
you know make things happen and I found like it is a way to express who I am
and I do not design really comfortable clothes. I understand so it's
for you about taking ideas and turning them into real things in the real
that was a challenge that makes you feel empowered. Is this correct?
Because, you know, as a child, we have this fantasy world inside our head.
And for me, I imagine a lot more than, I'm more of a visual learner
than someone who could just read.
So anytime you, if you tell me a story, I visualize it in my head just like that.
It's like a movie playing in my head.
So, I think I have like these crazy, crazy ideas and I really want to put it to paper
and then make it happen.
So that's one main reason why I started fashion.
This is so relevant.
It's like a metaphor.
There are many women who might have crazy ideas, crazy passions, crazy dreams, but
they grew up doing what their parents expected of them.
Maybe they tell them you have to be a doctor or a lawyer
and they follow that path, but they feel stuck.
They feel like they need to be people pleasers for that.
And then they have, maybe they visualize at night
all the great things they could do.
What is your advice for those women
so that they take steps towards their real passion
so they feel alive without the worry
that, oh, I might disappoint my parents or if I fail,
people will laugh at me and call me a loser
or anything of the worries that can come up when someone worries a lot?
Yeah, so for me, you know, getting into the fashion field, especially where I live,
like not in Dubai, but like my home country. So here people, you know, when they say
you're a fashion designer, they don't, they think, you know, very low of you.
Like, you know, so I got so many criticism from older people, actually,
no one my age or anything just like older people like do you really think that you can make a living
out of just designing clothes so you just basically tailor things you just stitch things
so you know it really hits you in a really bad way like it really hurts sometimes like it's
your passion this is how you express yourself so to other women i'd say that people talk
People talk a lot. And if you really always take their opinions and everyone's opinions into consideration, you won't live your life.
And although I'm just 20, I've heard a lot from people. So I'd say that take it from one ear and then just let it out.
It's not going to do you any good if you just sit and listen and then overthink about what people would think and what they would say.
Thank you. I really wish you strength and always more strength to pursue your vision and your goals,
because that's what makes life worth it. It's not doing what people expect just for a paycheck
while you're dying inside. It's never worth it. And to ask you something relevant, because you said
when people criticize your passion, it hurts. And something also related is we live in an age
where most people live now on social media,
they live on their phone or however they consume it.
And therefore many teenage girls are growing up,
many women who are in their early 20s, et cetera,
they compare themselves to Photoshopped women
on Instagram or now AI generated, they don't even exist.
And they think, I am so ugly, I don't look nice.
They don't see their unique beauty
and that makes them demotivated
because they think, oh, I'm too ugly to succeed.
Let me just die or whatever it is that can come.
So for you, what's your advice
so that it helps them with that possible depression
and with comparing themselves to other women?
I think, you know, personally for me, I'm very skinny.
So I get criticized for being skinny all the time.
And I see these women, you know how you look at models,
even though they're healthy, they're healthy,
but then people will be like, you're skinny, that's not healthy.
And I don't think that's really right because, I don't know,
being criticized for how you look and, you know, that's not really nice, that's really painful.
Thank you. And it's an important topic because sharing your truth with other women
is really, really important and helpful. I had so many messages from so many girls and
through and are going through the same problems and struggles. And so, this is very important
rather than only talking about achievements and successes and things that make them feel
even more inferior. It's about understanding that it's part of human nature to go through
mental health and issues and worries and struggles and that you can make it out at
and then we're all alive in order to learn and progress and improve.
Right. But you know how one thing that I really like about social media right now,
like people started showing what it is to be a real human being rather than, you know,
just all, you know, full filters and all of that.
Like when you see a couple years back, everyone, you just show someone who they're not,
but now people are more comfortable in their skin.
There are women who show their realistic makeup looks or like how their skin texture look how their body look stretch marks and all these things and that makes so many people feel so much comfortable because even as a little girl I compared myself to so many women.
Like you see so many women out there.
They're so beautiful. They're so beautiful, but you compare yourself to them and you know, people have this thing like, oh, that is beautiful, but you, you're not like, if you have a mustache or a grown-up's eyebrow, people will be like, that's not the beauty standard. And I genuinely like how it is improving right now.
I agree with that 100% and I appreciate that you're opening up and sharing because it's very,
very important for women to hear each other, for people to listen to women and to understand
even more. I notice again that it's important for you to feel safe.
Can you tell me a bit more about that? Like both, how could that have limited a bit your
life? And what could be the reason that caused that to be a high priority? Because one, Dubai
is one of the safest places in the world. That's number one. Secondarily, you are someone
with a lot of crazy energy that you show to the right people, the childish energy
which often feels safe, like children feel often safe. That's why they open up.
Is there anything that could be the cause of the need for safety? Is it worry or
just for you that you, your vivid imagination, you said you can imagine stories in your brain
and that makes you imagine too many horror stories in your mind or tell me a bit more about that.
It's not just me overthinking, there's a part of me that's overthinking but there's also a
part of me who's been through so many things that I don't feel really comfortable talking about
But all my life I had people come in and out.
I've not really had people stay in my life.
So there are like really few people
and I'd say it's mainly family.
For many people, or like many people my age, honestly,
people feel more comfortable around random strangers.
But these strangers, some people,
they're like much bigger than family.
And that's totally understandable.
But for me personally, although so many things happened
and I have grown. I have different stages in my life and the only people who really stuck with me
was my family. So they're the ones who made me feel safe and those people who make me feel like
I'm their family, I feel safe around them. I love that. That was poetic. That was very well said.
And so now that you're finishing and completing your fashion education,
I encourage all your goals and dreams, so I don't want you to overthink this question,
but what is your next vision for what you want to create in this life?
Do you want to create a brand, work within a brand, just become a freelance designer?
Are there things that you dream of that you think will be the right next step for
you?
Okay, so I do have a set plan since I was in fifth grade.
So I wanted to start my brand.
So, but then I don't think it's smart for me as a person
to just suddenly jump into it.
So I thought maybe after my uni,
I'll start working in a brand.
And then slowly during this time,
I learn how the real world is.
Because in uni, you don't get to explore too much.
So I would like to learn a bit more
and then start my own brand.
I do have my own label right now,
But just to, you know, further make it official and all those things, it takes time.
So I do have a plan to start a brand and it's not just like, I just don't want to start
a random brand.
I want to, I want to help people like, you know, there are many people who really
want to be fashionable or there are people who have crazy ideas like me in their mind,
but then there are people who cannot afford it.
So for me I want to make my prices available for different people and that's one main goal
I have. I like that that's very kind so you want the people who are more crazy like you and want to
have some special fashion with your label but to be able to afford it and for you since you said
you also work within the fashion field or you're familiar with it and progressing in it
in Kerala as well as in Dubai or how is it? For me I've lived my whole life in Dubai and that's
like home to me so I would like I would love to start my brand in Dubai and especially with Dubai
fashion week happening it started this year so you know they're going globally and I think
Dubai is progressing a lot more in fashion so which is why I would like to start off in
if inshallah, if God wills.
I believe in you and I know you will make it 100%.
Thank you so much, Alina.
It was my privilege and my honor to have you here,
to share your voice, your story and your perspective.
I wish you honestly all the success in the world
and to break free from any limitations
and to always be the childish, crazy girl
that you can be and to create all your crazy dreams
and manifest them through real work into reality.
Thank you again.
Thank you so much for having me.
It means a lot.
