E288 Patricia Alexandra Bontescu

Hello, my name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorced mother. She is really my superhero. That's why it's important for me to support women to share their uniqueness, their personalities, perspectives, and emotions about this world. In these difficult times in human history, we need to bring the people of the world together. And when we hear the voices of women, when we listen to real lives of women from other countries, we connect our cultures without differences or stereotypes. And we get inspired by their stories to live a better life. That's what this podcast is all about. My guest today is Patricia Alexandra Bontescu. Patricia is an automation and computer engineering student from Timisoara, Romania. Patricia likes to sing. She used to sing traditional Romanian music and she also was into acting when she were younger. Patricia likes to read, especially history and modern history books. She is also a volunteer for the student's organizations in her faculty. Patricia, how are you today? Hello, I'm fine. I just ended a busy day at the university. How are you? I feel blessed. I feel very happy and lucky to spend this time with you and very curious about you as a woman and as a person. So I'll begin with this nice first question. If your friends and your family and the people who love you most could describe your personality, what would they say about you? Always happy, funny, energetic, ADHD, yes. I love that. I want to focus on the happy part because I feel it's missing within humanity nowadays. too many people are constantly depressed and sad and unhappy. What inspires you to be that happy girl? Is it something, let's say in the past you were little and you were sad and you're like, I don't want this. I'm stopping the sadness. I'm going to be happy. Is it some inspiration? Is it from your life acting from your parents? How did you become this person? And what's your energy. I used to be a bullied kid in my school 12 years of scholarship I was constantly bullied but I started to see how blessed I am I have a beautiful family I have brought my parents healthy and with me I have where to live I have what to eat I have the things I want I have absolutely no reason to be I like that. That's absolutely fantastic. And I want to think even further, just wondering, if there is a girl who's getting bullied and it can happen all over the world, instead of her becoming depressed and bitter, what would be your advice for her? Like, what should be done in such a situation, whether to herself so she protects her mental health or somehow to fix it? Like, if you could go back to yourself when you are younger and bullied? What advice would you give? If they can't see something special in you, they won't bully you. If they see that you're smart, you're beautiful, you have talents, whatever, they will bully you. The envy is the most, the greatest compliment. It can't be faked. I love that way of thinking. That's a strong mindset. Thank you, Patricia. And you're story of how you discovered that you love singing. How did you dive into that? I started singing somehow when I was a little bit old, at 14 years old, in the serious way. I always liked to sing, to listen to music. In my family, there are a lot of talented person in this way. But my parents didn't really want it for me to be a singer. They didn't think it's a safe world. But I did it anyways. I love that. And you're doing often you are singing some traditional Romanian songs. I know that Timi Suara within Romania is a more of a unique area. If you can share some things about people who might not have visited your region, your part, how are the people, how is some of the culture, how is the personality of the women and of the people there? Yes, I can say about people from Timisoara and from Banat that we are very very proud to be here. We are very known as a rich region of Romania and very multicultural. We are very In the other parts of Romania, there are some little ethnic conflicts, but in Banat there are no conflicts between ethnicities. People are usually ethnically mixed in Banat, and that's how we are so peaceful and yes. Yes, peaceful and tolerant, and you're someone who loves reading history books. I know that you described it in a very beautiful and historic way, but why, like it's unexpected somehow. It seems to me that many people think being modern means to ignore history. So for you, why are you interested in history and how did it help your thinking and your life? I would like to say that my father is a history teacher here in Romania, But I somehow hated history because he was my teacher and I felt somehow stressed. But I discovered history later and I realized that ignoring history is the biggest humanity mistakes. And we will repeat over and over again the same mistakes if we don't know that something like this happens in the past and it wasn't good for us. I think it's humanity's most important thing. Yes. History, if we don't learn from it, it will repeat the negative parts, I agree 100 percent. As a woman in Romania, which is known for a lot of interesting and intelligent people in the IT sphere, you study automation and computer engineering. How did you choose to study that? Do you find that women are empowered in Banat for example when it comes to IT or is it more they think oh no this is more for men or how is the attitude and your story of choosing this? I chose it by the end of the high school I wanted to study medicine but when the pandemic started I was in my last two years of high school After high school, I have to choose my university, and I thought it will be six years of medicine and to work in a hospital, in the remaining conditions in a hospital, and it's not for me. I've always been attracted to this part, computers, websites, web design, and I feel like it's more for me than medicine. But I still have like a part of me that said you should have gone to medicine especially when I have hard times during the university. I understand and I believe really you made the right choice. I also understand that you're a strong woman because in Romania and in the Balkan there is this culture of women being strong. What does it mean for you in 2023 in a time where parts of world. They're like, I don't know what it is to be a woman, what is a man and all that. What is for you the meaning of being a woman that is both has the femininity energy and also she can be strong? How is it and how is it different in Timi Shuwara compared to maybe other places in Europe or America or anything? I think that women are necessary for this world. women's kindness. And I think women are the kindness, energy everyone needs. And when you feel sad and something, you usually go to a feminine person, to a female mother, grandmother, female friend. We are the emotional part of the world. I like that. At the same time, I know you wanted to study medicine, but now you study computer engineering. Often you cannot be emotional. How is that for you that so often in the day you have to be in the logical space and not connect with the emotions? How do you take care of your mental health? How do you find in your day moments of strong emotions so that you balance the logic of computer science? For me, it's not that hard, because I think I got used to it, to being more logical than feeling. I just got my balance. I have my volunteering work that combines both logical and the feeling side and doing other activities, going for a walk and stuff like this. Of course. And also, I understand that you love to change your look frequently, your hair, your makeup, to have different styles and different looks. How is this related to your personality? Are you trying different things to discover new parts of you? Is it just fashion? You want to always look different and get attention? Or how important is this for you and what does it add to your life? I like changes and I'm afraid that getting older will make me not open for changes and having red hair was my dream since I was three years old and I saw the Little Mermaid and I said I want to have this hair no matter when I would like to do this and the reason why I did this, I really did this It's because I had a little mental breakdown after a big disappointment and I woke up one day and I said, I will go redhead. Just go buy hair dye and go for it, girl. It was somehow an escape from that situation and I saw it looks good on me and I'm kind of a rebel person and if some things come through my mind, I have to do it. I like that. And your rebel side, there are many women who maybe are too afraid of the judgment of their parents or of society, so they live without following their desires and their dreams. What's your advice for them so that they find their rebel attitude and then they do what they want, even if others criticize them? I would say you have only yourself in this life. Everyone is temporary. The society, the toxic persons in your life are temporary. You have yourself forever and do what makes you happy in the first place. Then other people, the society and everybody. One hundred percent. I love that answer. It's absolutely great. And now to understand you, it's spring, how is your week there in Timisoara? How do you balance your studies with having a full rich social life and so that you don't feel depressed and sad when the weather is good and people are enjoying themselves? Can you describe your typical day or week? Maybe some women who feel they're studying too much and don't have ideas how they can find some emotions in their week can be inspired. It's easy somehow because when I go to university, I have to walk by foot a lot and admire the nature, spring, and enter the university, study, have a little break, go outside, come back, and so on. The little breaks are the key. 100%. Thank you for that. And also to understand, because you told me, although it's not recorded here, that you want to live your life in Timi Suwara, that it's not interesting for you to go and start a life even in New York or London or California or anywhere. Some people would be interested to know what attaches you to Timi Suwara. Well, so many people nowadays all over the world, They have as a first goal not to change their hair to be red, but totally to go live in Paris or Madrid or any other place away from where they grew up, especially if they got bullied before. First of all, I have my family here and for me, for my life, my biggest value is family. Here is where I start and having family here I won't be able to go and live for a very long time Somewhere else and I was born here with this mentality being proud to be from Banat from Timisoara I just don't want it. I love this city. I love the people. I understand people I understand how the society works here and I don't want to change it Maybe I will go to work like maybe a month to half of a year, but every time come back to Dimisora. I like that attitude. Thank you, Patricia. And for your future, do you have some specific goals that are interesting for you? Do you want to work for a specific kind of business or field in computer engineering or do you want to start your own company? or how are your ambitions and dreams for the next years? Professionally in IT and computer engineering domain, I would like to work in cyber security. It's so interesting to me. And in other domains, I want to have a fresh restart to my music career that I somehow stopped because of university and my previous exams. and of the high school and so on. I want, I don't want to give up on music. And I also want to work in cybersecurity and to have a beautiful life with both of these activities. Thank you so much, Patricia. It was my honor and my privilege to include you in this project, to share your voice, to share your interesting thoughts. I wish you all the success, all the good vibes and that you will always feel happy, satisfied, surrounded by your family in Timișoara. Thank you. Thank you too and thank you so much for your good words and for this opportunity. I wish you all the best.