E318 Sara Araujo Lima

Hello, my name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorced mother. She is really my superhero. That's why it's important for me to support women to share their uniqueness, their personalities, perspectives and emotions about life. Too many women in this world feel alone. They worry about the judgment of others, and they struggle with their mental health. But when they listen to the Rare Girls podcast where empowered women share their voices and tell their stories, many women will feel inspired to live a life of freedom and to overcome all their insecurities. They will feel it is a safe space to find their confidence, to remember their unique beauty and to feel their self-worth, and they will connect with the sisterhood of rare girls who encourage their success and support their dreams. That's what this podcast is all about. My guest today is Sara Agaujo Lima. Sara is a Portuguese girl who is living now in Zurich, Switzerland. Sara worked many years as a secretary in medical offices, and now her hobbies are sport, acrobatics, to go for a walk, dancing, and being outside. Her goal is to become a dance teacher in Latin dance, in particular bachata and kizomba. Sara, how are you today? Hi, I'm really feeling great and also a little bit nervous because I'm a little bit scared and I just want to be like that everything is going to be fine, what I'm saying. Don't worry. I'm here with you to support you, to give you a great experience and to help you relax. I'll begin with this nice first question, which is, Sarah, if your friends and the who know you best could describe your personality, what would they say about you? They will say that I'm a really good listener and also giving really good tips like when they have a problem or relationship problems, that I'm the person giving you some tips like, hey, don't worry, life is going to be okay, there are a lot of men outside. So I will say it like that, and also that I'm really like an open person, like I'm really like for new things, like open up like for everything, and I'm really funny, like outside, the adventurous person, like I'm really like loud when I'm outside. So I'm now a little bit loud because I'm a little bit nervous, but that's me. Thank you. I love that. And I want to focus on the part where you said you're open and adventurous. Nowadays, it seems to be that all of society, not only women, but women in particular, they might feel stuck in their comfort zone. They worry a lot and they worry, oh, if I'm open to new things, maybe it will be dangerous, maybe something will happen, whatever it is. What do you do so that you are excited and open? And do you worry? But how do you stop it? Or what is your advice for those girls? I think my advice is to find like your passion about the work of and because for me it was like when I started like with dancing because I started like 10 years ago with salsa and I was like, I would never make it or I would never like learn other dances. And then I just keep it on and work really hard. And now I'm here like dancing apachatiki something like five years ago, and I'm working on it, and I start with handstand and alcohol, but I think just, you have just to keep it, just work on it and just think about that you will make it. Like if you want really that, you just have to keep it on it. Thank you. And to ask you specifically about Latin dances, what interests you in it? And do you find it like a type of therapy that makes you fall in love with who you are, the way your body moves and it's good for your psychology or what other benefits did you enjoy from Latin dance? I think I love Latin dance because of the music first. I love Pachata music because it's so romantic and heartbroken. And I love Spanish. And I love also dance Pachata because I have this deeper connection with the leader. So it's really nice to have this connection with the human being. Like it's not the band itself, a woman or a man. And I feel like, I don't know, like after the dance, I feel like really like strong and sexy. I don't know, it gives me this feminine type because I'm like more masculine type. So if I go dance, it's giving me this feminine energy. It's like, oh, yes, I feel like I'm a woman now. And also, I think dancing is really good therapy. like if you're like like sad or like that. Dancing helps me a lot just to get like all my stress out and just get my emotion out just to be free again. I love this. Let's discuss for a while bachata and I will begin you know step by step in what I want you to share more of. First, you said you are more in your masculine energy and then you feel in your feminine during bachata? Did you need to overcome anything where maybe you worry about following or you resisted following or how did you open yourself to that? And if you generalize it, do you feel that some women nowadays are so much in their masculine and they're not really feeling safe to follow? Or what's your perspective only on this? And then we'll speak about leadership, will speak about all that just in specifically being in the masculine energy and trusting to go to the feminine and how different it feels. I think to get over it's like you have to trust like your partner like I think for me it's like when I started dancing like with Sals, it was for me not easy to trust the leader because I was like no I want to be the no don't touch me like but then i think after years like i keep like going on and on then i realized oh okay that's really nice like oh the awesome men say are like nice so okay oh the dance can be like nice if i just let you go just let my masculine energy just just go and be a feminine so like i think i think the best if you have like masculine energy like me it's I think the best is just to let it go. Just trust the process, just trust the leader and just trust the dance. I think the beautiful in the dance is just to let it go. Just let it go, just feel the energy around the people, feel the energy from the leader. Because they are really good leaders, they give me a lot of energy. And I was like, yeah, wow, this was really nice dance with you. So like after the part, I go home like with a lot of energy, a lot of happiness and like love. And I saw that was so good, like dance with all those people and all happy. And I think there are also a lot of women that have a lot of feminine energy. I think for them, it's like, I saw some girls like dancing. And I think they just need to also let it go because they are like this family just touchy and I don't know like they always like dressing up just to I don't know how to say like to show them and hey I'm beautiful you should take me like I think they should have to let the standard like just let it down a little bit just be yourself just I don't know don't worry like if the guy like you or not or don't worry like if the man don't like your clothes or like just let it go like just be yourself you don't have to dress up for a guy just be yourself like go. This is a very important point let's expand on it a little bit we live in a time with social media and expectations from society that makes women feel ugly if they don't dress up and put all the makeup, et cetera. And they would say to you, how do I let it go? If I look at my Instagram, it's full of girls who are dressed up all the time. What do you mean let go? What's your perspective on that? Maybe some women cannot find their own beauty if they don't do that. So what advice might you have about it? I don't know. When I was a beginner, I was also like dressed up and putting makeup. But then I realized that there are a lot of men they don't interest like how you look like they're just interested like the dance So when I stopped with makeup and dressing up just go like big leggings I don't mean t-shirt dancing I know this is there was a lot of men like they are like asked me for the dance Like before when I was like on makeup and pressed up. So I was like, oh, okay There are some men they don't interested like how I look so for me like, if I go dance, I just go by myself, because why should I go dress up and put makeup and then after night I'm waiting and waiting that the leader asked me for the dance. So that's why I just changed my mind. I was like, no, I just go there, just have dance and just enjoy. If something happened, okay. If not, if something happened, it's also okay. Just I think just don't be worried about what the man or like also like the women around you, thinking about you, how you style, how you see your makeup. Just go. If you feel nice, place up and put the makeup, you can go. If not, it's also okay. You don't have to worry about people thinking about you. Thank you. That's very important. And returning to the point of trust, you said it's essential for you to feel comfortable following, to let go that you trust the leader. Let's say you're a leader. What can you do so that you have, let's say, a woman who's too much in her masculine and afraid to let go, in order for her to trust and let go? Do you tell her or, like, let go and just let yourself follow? Do you do something that can help trust? Do you do it gradually, step by step, slowly? What is your advice on that, which also can help maybe even some women who want to give tips to some leaders so that they allow themselves to trust the process. How can it go? If I'm a leader, I will make sure that she's feeling comfortable with me. I will ask her nicely, look her in the eyes, do you want to dance with me? And she will say yes. Then I will go on the dance floor and then I will see just to see like where her level is because you cannot do like advance with the follower if she's not there. Like that's not okay because every types of body are different. Everybody have like different levels. So I would just start with small steps just to see and also and it's really important then to like looking in her eyes like always looking in her eyes, feel her comfortable, just don't touch some parts that's not like, how to say, it's not okay, like, yeah. So I will feel, I just want to let her be comfortable in that and also just look in her eyes, because it's really important dance, just look in her eyes and say to her, hey, it's okay, You don't have to do like a lot of stuff like just just to beginner stuff like and listen to the music And when I want to give some tips for the leaders is just that just be nice to the women's because There are some moments. They are not good. There are some rooms They are good so just be nice to the women's because I don't know because we are like a dispatch other community and When people are coming like new people like beginners just be nice to them Just try to have a dance with them. Just have fun, just laughing and share some love. Because Pachata, it's going like a big community. So I think they have just to be nice with everyone. I love that. That's a beautiful recommendation. And you mentioned now that it's important to share the love. And earlier you said that when you feel in that feminine energy after a great dance, you go home and you feel full of love. Just for any woman or even yourself, how is it different when you are in your masculine energy? How do you get energy? And how different is it to that energy of love? Are you a different person? Can you be happy when you're masculine? And how different is it to being happy in your feminine? What is the love that you mean? Is it positivity? Can you explain that experience more and compare it to your usual way what you said is more when the masculine energy. And if I'm like in a masculine energy, like I have a lot of this protection, like I have protect me, that I don't let a lot of people come inside of me because nowadays we are living in this world, maybe different counties like in Switzerland, the people are really cold. And sometimes they are like, I don't know, they see if you're like a nice person, they will just suck your energy up then they just will let you down. So that's why masculine energy is for me like, it's just protecting me and my emotion that nobody gets inside. And then when I'm going dancing, it's like me, that's just like, I'm going just to let that guardians down, just to be once like, I just want to let that everything like out, just to be once, just to feel that love, just to feel like, ah, he cares about me. Okay, I will just carry on with him. Like, I don't know, after the dancing, I'm feeling like a totally new person. I don't know, it's like, it's like, one time I'm feeling like, yeah, I can trust these people like in the dance community. Like, I know they will not do some stupid or don't hurt me or they don't stock my energy up because it's dancing, we have to have fun and laughing and like just like to be nice to each other. Yeah, I think that be nice to each other. That's what I want to say. Thank you. And you spoke about energy a lot. Are you sensitive to people's energy? Are you an empath? Do you feel everyone's energy? And so you're also sensitive to feeling when any people have negative energy or suck your energy dry, or in Switzerland, because people are so cold that even if you're not an empath, you still feel it a lot? Yeah, I'm a person like if I'm touching someone, somebody on the hands, that I can feel the energy of them. Like in dancing, I can feel that. I can feel that leader like if he's like a nice leader or not a nice leader. I can also feel like, oh yeah, we have the connection so the dance will be great. I don't know, for me it's like the people don't talk much with you because because they just don't know you and also they have like their own circle like for me it's like yeah for me it's like i have to accept that but when i going like dancing i see this community like they really like open like everybody's like welcome you can come like they all are also like open up to meet new people and i like that i like that energy, like, because I'm also like that, I'm also like open to new things, open to new people, like, open to try new things out. So I want to be in that energy, and not the other energy that, yeah, that I'm living in. So that's why I'm balanced, the both energy that I have the both with me. I understand. And at the same time, you mentioned that you enjoy going outside, going for a walk, I imagine that you nature, what does that give you? Is it a similar energy where you feel love and happiness? Is it like recharging your battery? Or what is fascinating to you about being in nature and spending time outside? For me it's like just I think just to change a little bit the routine not just only to do dance like us like just go for a walk, see new things. Also just to take some just by myself, just recharge by myself. Like if you're like dancing a lot on the weekends, like you're going out with your friends, there are some days that I just want to be like sometimes with me by myself, just doing stuff that I like to just go for a walk, listen to some music or also I love also listen to some podcasts. Just yeah, just recharge me, my energy and my soul just to be myself just a little bit that then I have a full energy then to start the weekend, just start the week then after. Perfect. And to you, you live in Switzerland, yet you love the Spanish language, you love Latin dances. Why not move somewhere where everybody is like, it's much more common to do bachata and things like that, whether it's Spain, maybe even Portugal, South America. What about Switzerland keeps you there? If it seems that you said the people are cold, probably the weather is not sunny and the Bachata community is not as big as it is in other places. Yeah, I talk a lot about that, but I think like I'm working on it. Like I'm looking for a county that I can go there moving out. But at the moment, I have a lot of stuff here that I have to resolve first, that I can then go. For me, I have to be sure with my heart that I can go. At the moment, I should wait a little bit just to go, just to be sure that I can let it go. I love that and that's super relevant to this, which is what I want to end with. There are many women who are not reaching their potential because they worry and they're not sure they let it go. They stay in their comfort zone because they're like, I don't know if I go for my dream. It's unknown what if I fail and then I feel disappointed and other people laugh at me or judge me or my parents are disappointed or my friends think I'm crazy or something like that. In general, what would be your advice for them so that they're willing to try all those new things and see what happens? Because life is much better when you try instead of imagining and regretting later if you don't do it. I think like for me, it's like you have to be like 100% with you by yourself. Like you have to be sure if you want that, like sure to show like in your heart, not your mind like not with your ego. I think there are some people that thinking like just thinking with their egos but not think with their heart. So for me it's like I have to think like if my heart wanted I go but if my heart is like yeah we should maybe wait I will wait because you never know. Maybe there are some reasons that my heart is saying not yes right now because you never know like you can like do a lot of stuff but you have also to think about yeah It's like, it's your heart or it's your ego that want that, like just to know the difference. Thank you so much, Sara. It was my privilege and my honor to interview you, to share your voice. I wish you all the success to become the best bachata and Latin dance dancer and teacher you can be and for you to be happy every day and share the love. Thank you. Thank you very much for this opportunity to be here this podcast. And also thank you that you're supporting women. That's really like nice from your side. And yeah, and I hope that your podcast is going like really big that a lot of women see that and supporting each other. And it's really nice what you're doing. So thank you. You are welcome. And I appreciate all your support.