Episode Transcript
Hello, my name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorced mother.
She's really my superhero.
That's why it's important for me to support women to share their uniqueness, their personalities,
perspectives, and emotions about life.
Too many women in this world feel alone.
They worry about the judgment of others and they struggle with their mental health.
But when they listen to the Rare Girls podcast where empowered women share their voices and
tell their stories, many women will feel inspired to live a life of freedom and to
overcome all insecurities they will feel.
It is a safe space to find their confidence to remember their unique beauty and to feel
their self-worth, and they will connect with the sisterhood of rare girls who encourage
their success and support their dreams.
That's what this podcast is all about.
My guest today is Valeria Astakhovskaya.
Valeria lives in Dubai and works as a business assistant for a Russian businessman.
Originally from Siberia in Russia, Valerya is preparing to create her own
course for future professional business assistants after six years of experience.
She finished her education in law at the best law university in Russia, Moscow
State University. Her hobby is swimming, gym, reading books about psychology and
playing chess. Lera, how are you today?
Oh, hello, Aziz. I'm fine. Thank you so much. Today, it was too much busy day, but I'm here
and I'm glad to see and hear you. And I'm glad to present myself in your podcast.
Thank you. It's my honor, my privilege. I feel very happy to have you here. And
I'm very curious about you as a woman. So I'll begin with this nice first question,
which is Lera, if your friends and the people
who know you best could describe your personality,
what would they say about you?
I think my friends can say about me that I am crazy,
that I can do some things which they cannot do
because for me, it's not difficult to move
to another country for one day,
like it was for Dubai in my situation
when I collect my things, my clothes,
solve some problems in Russia.
And I found decision with my ex-husband about our daughter.
And I'm here in Dubai already.
I have been living here for almost nine months.
And I think my friends can say about me
that I am a little bit of a superwoman and I think and I am sure that they are proud
of me and they can support all time, give me support, advices, give me energy and I
can tell them everything which happened in my life. And yes, I am sure that my friend
It's my friend, my family, and that's why they can support me all the time and be proud of me.
I'm happy about that. That's absolutely fantastic.
I actually have two questions, but I'll begin with your crazy side.
It's very important, I believe, today that women do what society will call crazy,
because that's how they can live their dreams and their potential.
they go for opportunities. But often today there are many women who worry a lot, who may be like
you in your situation about going to Dubai. They think, oh, Dubai is far from Russia. If something
happens, my family and friends are too far. What will happen? And they worry and stay in
their comfort zone and never live life in a way that gives them their potential. What's your
advice to such women and what makes you able to be such a superwoman who doesn't listen too
to the fear, but listens to her goals.
I have been living without my parents for already 11 years after graduation school.
And for me, it's not difficult to live without my parents because they give me all knowledge
about this life and behavior for my lonely life without someone.
And I can advise only don't be afraid of something, because only you are and you have only you.
It's too much important to know.
And I think and I'm sure women can everything in this life themselves.
And I want to say that everyone can rely on himself, herself, because it's only life for us,
for everyone. And don't be afraid of some frames, some limits, because it's only...
And only we can to hit them and live our life on the 100%.
I love that.
That was great psychology.
And it makes me think since your love psychology books,
is this why you read them or is it for other reason?
Like you want to understand some people or in the past,
maybe you had situations that hurt you
and you wanted to fix them.
Like how is this related to your love
for reading about psychology?
and why are you interested in psychology books?
After divorce, six years ago with my husband and when I stayed with my daughter,
with my little daughter, she was only one year at that time, I started to read these books
because I wanted to know myself, because I had the same many situations in my relationship
with men. And the same situation in my job, my education, and for me, it was too much problem.
And I wanted to solve it. That's why I started to read books about psychology. And yes,
it helped me to understand other people, understand myself, understand my child, understand
many things in this life. It's surely a good hobby for me and good information, yes.
Thank you. And nine months ago you moved to Dubai. It's very different, the weather,
the culture to Russia. How was the adaptation? Did you in the beginning have a culture shock?
Tell me more so that let's say there is a woman even maybe from Russia who's listening,
who wants to go to Dubai.
Can you share the first experiences you had and now
how is it different, your adaptation to Dubai?
For me, Dubai, it was my love from the first sight.
I was here many times before my moving.
I was here already maybe five, 10 times
and my family is here every summer.
And for me, it's not a problem.
I like Dubai too much, fortunately.
That's why for me, it's not difficult to adopt here and for me, it's not a difficult
adaptation everywhere because I lived in China, I lived in London and for me it's not a problem.
But in Dubai, it's a big difference of other country because it's a Muslim country, UAE,
and maybe some people don't know about rules,
which they are here.
And for someone it can be difficult,
but I think when I come to another country,
for me should follow the rules of this country
because we are guests here
and it's important to know about it
and remember about it.
But here for me too much freedom,
too much lovely people. It's too much tolerance country and life is here. For me, it's more
easier than Russia, especially nowadays. But maybe, unfortunately, I like Russia too much.
but today it's Dubai for me, sunny, good weather,
no, no rains, only love, money.
And Dubai motivates me to earn money more
and more and more and more.
I don't know why, but here, yes, I see my growth more
than anywhere where before I lived, yeah.
I love that energy and it makes me wonder
because some people complain,
especially women, you spoke about your friends which are as much lovely part of your life as your
family or even more. You said that your friends are probably from a long time so they're probably
in Russia or Russia or maybe in China or in London as you said. Some people say in Dubai,
you work too much and so you don't have time to meet friends or make friends or even if you
am busy with making money and earning etc. Is this a problem for you? Are you
someone who can make friends easily in Dubai and you have new friends that are
taken also a part of your life or you're living life too busy to make many new friends? You're
more focused on your career and you notice that most people are always ambitious and busy.
What can I say? That today we are adults and we have many issues, we have work, we have children, we have family and for me it's not a problem not to meet with my friends too much often and for my friends it's not a problem as well.
But I try to meet with my friends twice a week.
For me, it's important because I have a lot of work every day.
I have my own project. I have my work.
And I have to do these issues because it's important for me.
It's my life. I like my job. I like my life. I like my friends.
I like my family. And I want to be married one more time.
Maybe it will be like, yeah, and it's important, but it's not a problem.
And I think my friends and me, we have to understand each other for living and communicating.
I have a common chart in Telegram or WhatsApp with my seven closest friends.
They are living in Russia.
I live here, and two of my friends want to move to another country, for example, Argentina.
And we will live in any part of this world, and it's funny, it's nice, because we can
come to each other, to Dubai, to Argentina, maybe to Europe, something in the USA,
and it's nice, it's cool.
I have some moments when I miss my friends too much.
I can cry a little bit, 10 minutes, and that's it.
But we are adults and now we are building our own life.
Thank you. And since you're building your life, I know that you are thinking about creating a
course for executive assistants, business assistants, that kind of field.
two things. One, tell me about your project to create this course and two, is it a good idea,
let's say there is a woman from Argentina or from Russia or from China and she wants to move to
Dubai. Is it one like a great idea for a job to aim to become a business assistant or executive
assistant? So instead of searching for any other job that could be a good thing in Dubai that
in demand. So both things about your course and the potential for that job within Dubai.
Ah yes, sure. For me it's a big pleasure to say about it. I have a big experience in this job.
I have a big experience like a business assistant because after my graduation university
I have been working for six years already like a private assistant or private and business
assistant and now I know that I have much knowledge about this job and I can give for
another woman, I can share with another woman with my knowledge and I think it will be
good because in my opinion it's a perfect remote job because you can be anywhere in
from bathroom, from yacht, from beach, everywhere.
And it's a good income, it's good salary.
And for me it's important for women who have children
or maybe newborn children.
It's useful and comfortable to have work and to do it from your home.
For example, when you have children, you can play with your children and you can pay attention
to your job.
It's not a problem.
It's really comfortable.
That's why I want to share, I want to teach another woman for this job.
I wanted to share with another woman about some of my key advices, some useful kills
which I have because I have many mistakes and every boss taught me everything in this
job and for me it was easier and now I think I can share everything which I have.
with another woman, and it will be a good experience in their life, in their salary,
in their own income.
And they can be independent from their man, from their husband, from their boyfriend,
because it's too much important to be independent and to can give yourself everything what
you want.
Thank you.
I love that. And you said that Dubai inspires you to grow more and making more money and progress.
You need confidence for that. There are a lot of women who maybe look at Instagram,
at other women there, and women who are living in a yacht every day with champagne,
and they think, oh no, I'm not successful like that. And they lose their confidence.
Did you have such comparison ideas? And how do you keep your confidence? What's your advice
for women so that they can have their confidence, even if they look at social media with many
images of women who look like they're living their best life every day.
I think one important thing is not to compare yourself with other people.
Because we are unique and we have our own experience in our life.
We have different ways.
I have one way, my friend has one way.
It's important to know that you are unique and you can do yourself what you want, if
you want it really, because often we don't have our own wishes, because we can see in
the Instagram, in the social media, photos, as you said, about yachts, champagne, clubs,
No, for me it's not easy to live here because I have a lot of work, sure, and when I see
these photos in Yavtse, we have our own ways, and if you want something, and if it's
your own wish, you will have it early or late, but you will have it exactly.
I'm sure because for me when I came to Dubai for the first month I had only one day off
and I worked, I had a working day like 17-18 hours a day and I thought that it was too
difficult for me. But now I can do job, I can meet with my friends, I can be in
yacht, I can be in club, but I have to balance my work time, my lifetime
every day and do what I want. And one main rule is love what you want. And
in Dubai I understood that I like this job and after when I was resigned from my first work in
Dubai when I came here from in November from March after only this job I understood that business
assistant is only for me and no one job no one only business assistant and after that I understood
that what I want, what I love, and only this can,
no, only this gave me success.
Thank you so much, Lera.
It was my privilege and my honor to share your experience,
your voice, your thoughts, and I wish you all the growth.
I wish you to help a lot more women
with discovering, understanding, and growing
in the field of being business assistant
and to always live your best life ever in Dubai. Thank you so much.
Thank you too. For me, it was too much pleasure to share with you my thoughts and my experience,
and I'm sure that all my things can help other women to live their life.
I agree 100%.
