Episode Transcript
Hello, my name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorced mother. She is my superhero. That's
why it's important for me to support women to share their uniqueness, their personalities,
perspectives, and emotions about this world. In these difficult times in human history,
we need to bring the cultures of the world together. And when we listen to real people,
to real lives of women from other countries, we connect our humanity without our differences
or stereotypes, and we get inspired by their stories to live a better life. That's what this
podcast is all about. My guest today is Doyna Elena Simeon. Doyna is the events and community
manager empowering women through Women in Tech Romania. Doyna graduated in cybernetics, statistics,
and informatics at Bucharest University of Economic Studies in Romania. She started her career
in the IT industry when she was in her master's degree. So now, with more than seven years of
experience in software development, she played several roles within the development team,
starting as a business analyst, continuing as a scrum master and release manager. Last year,
she moved from corporate to startup life, and now she is a product manager at Ronin Building
Crowdfunding Investment Solutions. She says that her new life is more challenging, but she thinks
that will help her grow exponentially. One of her mottoes is, the difference between try
and triumph is a little oomph. Doyna, how are you today?
Hello Aziz. Thank you so much for the invitation. I'm happy and also curious
about how this podcast will start and how it will be.
Thank you. I'm honored. I'm lucky. I'm privileged to have you here and very curious about you as
well. So to begin to ask you, are you a curious person since you said that? Is curiosity a big
driver in your life, in your education, in the work and the association work and everything you do?
Yes, to be honest, it was the driver in my life. Since I was a child, I was really a curious person
discovering new things, new spaces, new people, learning new stuff. And yes, I'm here today
because of my curiosity, because I ask a lot of questions and I'm really grateful for this.
Thank you. And people can be curious for many, many reasons. Are you more curious because
you love new emotions, you love new discoveries, it's emotionally thrilling for you
because without it, you'll feel bored? Or is it more about intellectual stimulation that you want
to learn about life, that you love to know how things work, that when you were a little girl,
you broke all the toys down to know what's inside and how they're working? Which part is more
pronounced within your personality or any other reason? I think there are two reasons. The first
reason, indeed, it's intellectual knowledge. I want to know, but also it's emotional somehow
because I like stories and being curious and discovering new things, I discover also new
stories. And this makes me feel nice and happy and the feeling that I'm living. I think this is the
reason. I love that. I have so many questions, but you mentioned stories and that feeling of being
alive or the reason for living. How do stories in your mind connect to feeling that living emotion
that you like to feel? So I think all the time I said myself stories, nice stories, even maybe
the situation outside, it was not very nice or in a good way. But in order to protect myself somehow,
I think I said myself good stories in order to move on, in order to grow. And yeah, the life
created by stories, stories that are not mine. I'm living other lives and also enrich my own life,
I think. Thank you. Does this mean you also love novels and you read books and you watch movies and
TV series? And if so, what kind of such stories are most interesting for you? Is it like romantic
novels? Is it scientific, like science fiction or fantasy movies or series? Or tell me more.
Yes, indeed stories from books, stories from movies, but stories from also everything that is aesthetics.
I think I really like mostly these type of stories. From books, I really like the biographies
and the books that are written at the first person from a personal point of view. I think
in this way I can understand better emotions of others and how they feel about the situation.
Also in the movies, I really like the psychological ones, but also the ones with a good
aesthetics, like French movies from 60s. I really like that. And also design, fashion,
arts in general. I'm really into this. From when I was a child, I was looking, analyzing
spaces of women, friends of my mother, of my grandmother. I really wanted to be a lady.
And I think I become one. Thank you. I have at least five questions. This is so interesting,
but I'll begin with this. To you, what defines after analyzing all those people? What is the
definition for you of being a lady? What is it psychologically? If we could even say what is the
energy of femininity and of being a lady? If you could describe it, how does it work? And maybe
how is it different to being a lord or a man or a masculine? I think being a lady, I will say that
it's having three levels, from my point of view. The first level, the base is the ethical part,
the ethical part, moral part. The next one is the erotic, let's say, the inner, pure feminine
part. And the first level is the aesthetic one. So I will describe like this. But also I'm a big fan
of feminine and masculine energy because we as women, we don't have pure feminine energy.
I think I have a lot of masculine energy too. And I'm showing this energy mostly at work,
my masculine energy, to solve problems, to be ambitious, to be focused on results. But being a
lady in general in our society, mainly in Romania, is looking good and have manners, I think. And I
really appreciate that. I mean, to have manners in general, I think it's respect for yourself firstly
and afterwards for others. Thank you. I agree 100%. But I want more. Imagine there is a teenage
girl from Romania or from any place in the world who doesn't understand, like she wants to become a
lady, but she didn't have the opportunity to analyze like you did. Maybe because of the pandemic,
she didn't have so much social contact. She was isolated and she's confused about her own energy.
If you could explain to her in a way that she could understand or maybe describe the feeling
in your body, how is the ethical part, erotic part, and aesthetic part of a lady? And how does
she know when she's in her masculine energy or feminine energy? What difference is it? What would
you say? First of all, I will advise her to observe herself, to write down things that she likes,
things that she is good at, to observe others, the interaction between her and others, to express
herself a lot, not only by word, but also in any form, maybe clothes or, I don't know, dance or
whatever expression is comfortable with her, and to have courage to experience a lot of
other situations, a lot of opportunities, to embrace opportunities in order to discover herself.
And courage and curiosity in this aspect will help her define herself. And I really think
it's important to know yourself firstly, and after that, you can inspire others to know who you are
at the beginning, but not really to be a lady. I mean, the purpose is not to be a lady.
The purpose is to be what you feel that it's good for you. Maybe you're more tomboy, maybe you are
more masculine, maybe you are, but own that. I think this is important, to own and be yourself.
Thank you. And again, I have a lot of questions, but first I'm curious about something.
You tell yourself stories that, even in difficult situations, can keep you motivated and positive.
One, if someone is listening, they're depressed, they don't know how to tell such stories,
how can they do it? And secondly, what elements make a story that is worth listening to, that is
worth listening to, that is interesting? Because a lot of people think they're boring storytellers,
where they say, I woke up in the morning, I brushed my teeth, and I had a really nice breakfast,
it was so interesting. And people say, oh my God, that's not a story, what's going on? This is so
boring. And therefore, maybe you have some elements that you make the difference between
a story that nobody wants to hear, compared to a story that humans gravitate towards.
I will, for a person that is depressed or not feeling good enough in one day, in one month,
in one year, I will advise them to look at the nature and see how things are going in the nature,
to observe animals, to observe plants. I think they learn us how to be normal, how to not complain,
how to regenerate, how to adapt. I mean, nothing is permanent. I think if they understand the
temporary aspect of life, they can move on. And also to listen to music, maybe that morning that
was boring, doing the usual stuff, put some music, buy some flowers, do things for yourself. Don't
expect to go on a vacation just to be happy, make the happy moment in that moment, in that day. I'm
really into enjoy the moment. And I really believe that we have only one life. And if you think that
you will have another life or you will reincarnate or stuff like that, you will not feel, I mean,
really feel and really live in the present, in the moment, and have the courage to do all you dream
of in that life, in this life. I really believe this.
Thank you. And returning to stories, can fashion express a story? How can a person express their
story through fashion? Is it if they wear what they love that gives them that good feeling,
then they're telling their story and expressing their personality? Or should they wear things
that maybe like you spoke about, maybe have elements of French movies to express a story
that is related to French glamour or dress like they're from Los Angeles to express their
Hollywood story or being part of K-pop by dressing more Korean? Or how is it possible to use fashion,
aesthetic, and art in order to express a story through that? And not in a way, like in a video
on social media or something, but in real life? I will answer to this question in two parts
and continuing what I was saying at the previous question. So I really believe that happiness is
from in to out, but also from out to the inner self. So when you have a bad day, if you look
good, if you put a red lipstick and if you put some heels, I'm sure that your mood will increase.
I'm totally sure. I mean, it's proven. All the women out there will
approve this. But how to express yourself? I think this is the power of fashion. This is the power
of clothing. This is the power of makeup. I think, okay, they can be fake somehow, but they can
make you feel like you are from 20s, that you are from 60s. I think you can be whatever you want,
only using these elements. It's really amazing for me. You can be a lady, you can be a glamorous
lady from 20s, you can be a hippie girl from 60s, you can be a Spice Girls from 20s. So you can be
whatever you want to be, but you need to have the courage. Thank you. And you recommend to girls,
since you mentioned about trying many haircuts, to have the courage to have the courage to try
many things and self-discovery. Do you recommend they use fashion, makeup, like you mentioned,
to try all the different styles and eras and makeups and see how they feel and use that to
understand themselves better? Is this something that was part of your discovery of your lady
desires and attitudes, and specifically for you? How does it feel when you're dressed like a lady
compared to any other fashion style? So for me, this was part of my discovery indeed.
I imitated a lot. Some celebrities, I was looking on Pinterest at the beginning,
and afterwards on Instagram. But if you have some fashion icons you really, really like,
it's really important for me. But I didn't study only the clothing, I was studying also the movement,
I was studying also the way they speak. It was the entire process from my side. And for me,
when I'm dressing like a lady, and also I think people, if they are asked how I am,
they will say elegant indeed, because this is also the way I express myself, the way I move,
the way I make a point. And also when I'm wearing sports clothes, I think I have also something
chic, not really elegant, but maybe something chic. And it's part of me, I think.
Thank you. That's fantastic. And it's so fascinating to explore your unique personality
and perspective. And to take it to a larger scale, I know you're helping empower women
in tech in Romania. What is the situation of women in IT, in the IT field in Romania?
What empowerment do they need? What is missing? What is positive? What roles or what are you
trying to do with events that you're organizing? Tell me everything.
Tell me everything. Yes. So this is another part of me. Indeed, I'm a complex person.
So I've studied cybernetics and statistics and informatics. So I'm in the IT world. It's not,
I mean, it's from the left, it's for the left brain of me, but also from the right brain,
because I'm creating software products. And I'm part of Women in Tech Romania, which is
a brand new chapter here. It's the first time the organization is represented here. So what
we are trying to do is to support women, to support students, female students in their IT career,
to give them opportunities to reinforce the idea that they don't need to be like men. They have
something else complementary to what men have. And also the idea that they should not be perfect.
In Romania, I think girls are raised with this idea, they need to be perfect. But also in general,
women think that the perfection is the main resolution. And yes, we will have
a launch event for Women in Tech in January. I'm organizing this event. The topic of this event,
it's very interesting. It's about learning and continuous learning.
Also, we are covering education, but also the startup IT ecosystem in Romania, which is
increasing a lot. So I'm really keen to see the girls inspired and also to be inspired by the
speakers and our board of advisors. I love that. I encourage the success and the growth of your
events and the impact that you desire on women in IT in Romania. And you mentioned something that
you want to tell women, and this is relevant to women in all over the world, that they have
something complementary to men that is powerful. They don't need to try to be a man in a woman's
body or something like that. Maybe someone listening doesn't understand what that means.
Can you explain what power do women have that is valuable in this world and that is complementary
rather than competitive with the masculine role? It's maybe the power to listen, to see the big
picture, to create things. I mean, you know, we give birth and it's creation for me. And this is
powerful. We give birth. 100%. It's real power and it's creation of life and of something out of
nothing. And I know your motto is the difference between try and triumph is a little oomph. Can
you tell me what this means to you? How do you use it in your life, in your productivity, in your
vision? How does this impact Doyna as a person? I like to prove myself each day that I can do more,
better and to challenge myself. And this motto is to remind myself that I need to push my limits
each day to become the version I want to become, to have the life I want to live.
Thank you so much, Doyna. This was my privilege, my honor, such a great conversation and exploration
of your ladyhood or ladylike, as well as your masculine energy, which is both combines to make
you who you are and your perspective and your thought is enriching to every person who can
discover new aspects about themselves by listening to you and your story. Thank you again for
participating in this project. I wish you success. I wish you a wonderful launch in January 2023.
And I wish you to be proud of everything you're doing and to succeed in all the challenges.
Thank you again. Thank you, Aziz. Thank you for the invitation. Best of luck also for you and
hope you will inspire with your guests, with the women you have here, other women to have the
courage to express themselves and own who they are. Always. Thank you.
