Episode Transcript
Hello, my name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorce mother.
She is really my superhero.
That's why it's important for me to support women, to share their uniqueness, their personalities,
perspectives and emotions about this world.
In these difficult times in human history, we need to bring the people of the world together.
And when we hear the voices of women, when we listen, to real lives of women from other countries,
we connect our cultures without differences or stereotypes.
And we get inspired by their stories to live a better life.
That's what this podcast is all about.
My guest today is Maureen Wanjuku Wanjiro.
Molly is the very first girl represented Kenya in this project.
She loves to crochet and started her crochet business in May 2021,
after coming back from six months in Afghanistan.
Molly spent six months at the H. Kaya military base in Kabul, Afghanistan,
just before President Biden ordered the U.S. to pull out from the country.
Currently, Molly is working with her husband at an IT consultancy business in Dubai,
when she is not holding her yarn.
Molly loves hiking, which she does with friends often on weekends.
And lately, she developed an interest in Turkish series recently.
Molly started working out because her goal in 2023 is to have a perfectly toned body.
Molly, how are you today?
Hi, as is. I'm doing very well. Thank you for asking.
I'm happy. I'm honored and lucky to have you here.
And very curious about you as a person, so I'll begin with this nice first question.
If you're friends, the people who know you best and love you most could describe your personality,
what would they say about you?
Well, I think my friends would say like, I'm smart, creative, outgoing.
I mean, since I have a crochet business, I tend to have an eye for creativity.
And I also love hiking. So yeah, I think they will say like, I'm a very fun person.
Thank you. And then I will ask you a different kind of question.
A lot of people might see you have a first impression of you.
Is there something that you really wish people would know about you that often in the beginning?
They don't realize about your personality, your interests, or anything related to you.
Well, that's a tricky question. A lot of my friends think that I'm an introvert.
And most of the times when I meet people, they always feel like I'm so introverted.
But I tend to think that I'm an extrovert. I like to go out. I like to have fun.
I'm just, I don't like to be the one to make the first kind of move.
And I feel like that makes people like kind of judge me a lot of the times.
So yeah, that's really, really interesting because I know a lot of women will learn from this
because many, especially younger ones, don't feel comfortable in the making the first move
to make new friends and all that. So to ask you specifically about this,
what holds you back from making the first move? Is it a cultural thing? Maybe from Kenya?
Is it something where you worry about their judgment or just you don't feel right doing it
or you don't have the habit? Or what kind of holds you back from being the initiator?
Well, I tend to overthink a lot when it comes like meeting new people. And actually since I came
from Kenya, people tell me that I have an accent because there's like certain words that I
cannot be able to pronounce it correctly. So I always feel like if I approach someone and then I
say something that shouldn't be said how it's supposed to be said, then they're going to judge me
or you know how it is. And then another thing is a lot of people have different interests.
So when you meet someone the first time you don't know what exactly to say to them, like what are
you going to talk about? Like which topic should you go with and such kind of things?
I mean people are so judgmental out there. So that's why I don't like making the first move.
I'm very good at reciprocating whatever is thrown at me, but not the other way around.
Thank you. So you worry about judgment and you worry that people might think you're not
pronouncing somewhere is correctly and you don't know what topics or interests to speak to them
about. And that makes me think, how are you coping in Dubai? I mean you went to a new city where
really, if you don't know people, nobody will know you in many ways. So you're saying isolated.
What do you do in order to make new friends? How is your experience adapted to Dubai?
How was the energy of the city or impression of it? How different is it compared to Kenya,
compared to Afghanistan and all that? Well, I remember I came to Dubai in December 2019,
and I think it was 11 if I'm not mistaken. At the moment I came out of the airport, I was like,
wow, like this place is just so amazing, the light, I mean you know Dubai at night, how it is.
And the house able to cope the first few times that I came is I had some Kenyan friends
who I knew from before and they really helped me out like how to apply for jobs, how to
interact with people here and how to just put myself out there. And still up to now, a lot of the
times how I get to meet people, I don't have a lot of friends here in Dubai, but the ones that I have
have met them through friends and a lot of them are Kenyans because we have like Kenyan groups where
we go out, discuss, get to know each other, discuss what kind of things we are going through here
in Dubai. And so far that has really been helpful for me and also a lot of other Kenyans who have
who have also been helped through such forums and groups. Yes, the internet and your kinds of people
are really, really someone or a group that can support you no matter where you are. But then it
makes me think you are someone who is experiencing new places. And I know it's difficult to meet new
people. But when you meet someone new, what are you looking for? What indicators or characteristics
let you know? Yes, this is my kind of person. I should spend more time with this person or
know this person. I will keep them as a distance acquaintance and not really for me or tell me more
about your perspective and your approach. So what I try to look at when I meet someone new or
like individuals or groups is like a kind of energy they give me basically. Are they happy people?
Are they positive people? Are they are they fun? How do they talk? Who are they? I tend to look
at Instagram a lot. So I look I look them up who are they following what kind of things are they
liking so that at least I get to know who I'm interacting with who who is this person as an individual
as a group what's their cycle. And yeah, I don't look for much just happy fun
genuine and really positive people a lot. That's fantastic. And you spoke about yourself being an
extrovert who is mistaken for an introvert. Well, tell me about your extroverted side. What do you
enjoy that gives you most inspiration, excitement, new emotions? Are you a girl who gets bored
easily and you need often to party with your Kenyan friends and put some Kenyan music and dance
in the Kenyan way and feel almost at home with all those good vibes or someone who maybe when you
crochet your imagine yourself in some fairy tales at your princess or Turkish drama and you're one
of the characters or how do you keep yourself feeling new exciting emotions? Although sometimes
you know you can be in your bubble as someone who doesn't initiate or someone in a new country
with a different culture. Well, just when you mentioned the Kenyan music my mind was like,
hmm, he just hit the right spot. So I love a lot of Swahili movies. So a lot of the times when I
crochet I listened to music and like I also mentioned before I started there the Turkish series
which I'm really like really getting into and then they're not really productive and stuff.
But a lot of the times when I'm just by myself I listen to music, I crochet, I watch movies,
I go for hikes, I go for walking sometimes you know and I love social media and like I also mentioned
before this year my goal was to walk out is not worth sorry, is to walk out and get like a ton
body. So a lot of the times when I'm free and I'm not doing anything much I just do the
the skipping and the hula hoping just to know to keep myself busy. Thank you and I'm curious
why from all cities and places in the world did you and your husband choose to buy especially
that going for example from Kenya or Afghanistan Dubai is also a lot more expensive. What other
options did you consider and what did the scale for you both to think yes Dubai should be my new
relocation expect location? Well I will start with me since I'm Kenya it's very hard for me to get
a visa to go for example to Europe or the US or any other like continents that we consider
greener pastures and it is easy for me as a Kenya to get a visa to come here to Dubai
and when I get here like for example I came with a visa to visa myself for three months
and then I looked for a job when I was inside the country from Kenya you just need only like to have
this this was before in 2019 before they are they came up with the new regulations of the new
visa requirements as of I think it was this year or last year but 2019 it was not complicated you just
needed to take to pay for the visa and then pay for the flights and then have the means to be able
to support yourself inside the country so that's why I felt that Dubai was like an easy place for me
and I knew a lot of Kenya that's how they do you just get a visa to visa you come to Dubai
look for a job and the the company that you you get a job from the they give you the visa
and the insurance and most of them they also give you accommodation which is very nice
so if you for example as a Kenya and you want to go to Europe it's really complicated you need
a lot of papers you need it by tissue you need to know someone from their support you
so it was really like not an option for me at that time for my husband Dubai tends to have a very
good market for IT people especially guys from India they're very good with IT and it's very easy
to employ or to find someone to find someone to walk for you and you hear that's why he chose to
to relocate to Dubai and get someone to walk for him now we have one employee from India
and he's really good yeah thank you and let's discuss crochet what do you love most about it
because some of the younger generation women might think all crochets for grandmas it's old school
or even for you someone who loves excitement and new emotions every piece takes many hours and
you're almost doing repetitive tasks so how in addition to music in addition to watching movies
while you do it what do you find most fascinating about it what interests you in it
what draws you to it well what I like about crochet is one thing crochet is not for everyone
crochet has its own people like we have our own group you know it's unique it's it just has a
sense of belonging you know like like it's being in a party yes people might say like it's
doing the same thing it's repetitive but also what I feel like people don't understand crochet
is a lot there's a lot of stitches they might look the same from the outside but it's not the
same you get to play around with your creativity you as a crochet axis you have to learn how to
sketch so that's also like a bonus to it because before you start any project you have to to
think of it as an idea think of it I think what you need so also you're also like trying to
strategize how much yarn do you need so it's I honestly feel like it's special for me it's how
I get to be my own person it's how I get to identify my own people thank you when you look at
my social media a lot of the people that I follow a lot of the groups that I'm in are like for
crochet artists and it's really nice it's you just have to understand it you need to it's handmade
everything that's handmade especially it's um it has its own click not it's just not for for
everyone and when you find people who value and who see how much work you've put into it and
they appreciate it and they're able to buy something from me it's really fulfilling it's just like
that extra family member who's out there you know thank you and you mentioned it is full filling
and speaking even further about that so to understand you is it like the feeling that you're
searching for if you might say in life is a feeling of being valued of being unique with your
own unique tribe and being an individual not mainstream and being appreciated for doing some special
work that is not common did I understand correctly or what's your perspective on this yes you did
get me very correctly like I want to have my own click of people who value and treasure me as a
person as an as a as a designer for my own clothes you know yes you got me correctly thank you
and I want to know even more about you about Kenya in particular and let's say there are some
people who don't have friends from your country they haven't visited how would you describe the
culture or you as a Kenyan girl and how are you different from other girls from that part of Africa
what makes you unique what do you try to show to other people who are curious about your culture
is it the music like you spoke about first is it the food because some people will taste your
culture through the different plates or is it the personality of people there too or like very warm
or very judgmental I don't know that's why you're introverted and closed sometimes or tell me
about it thank you so much for the question it's really an interesting question that different
people have different perspective and how they look at it but I want to to say from my perspective
I think what makes us Ken and special is our educational and smart or food is nice you always
like to have a girl I mean if you have any Ken and friend out there they will always give you
girl every single time you visit them also when it comes to clothes we have like some really nice
afro clothes we have a lot of people who are creative and we have a lot of nice music we love to
listen to like I personally love to listen to Swahili music and yes I believe we are good people
thank you and it's really interesting for me that you had this desire to find greener pastures as
you mentioned and a lot of women in this world they struggle with anxiety maybe some mental
health or low self-esteem where they worry if they took the plunge and went to let's say Dubai
or Europe or the US or anywhere that oh my god what will happen they worry about bad negative things
or them being in situations where they don't have enough money or they lose everything or whatever
so how do you find the courage to take those steps what allowed you or helped you with your
ability to go out of your comfort zone and was at first and foremost about building relationships
online through forums with people who are already in the places you wanted to go before going
so you feel you know people or you think life is too short or maybe because of the pandemic you
think you only live once you can die tomorrow let's go or how do you overcome any resistance
and anxiety I mean what's the worst that can happen if I come to Dubai I mean the only thing that
should scare me is death and if I'm in Canada I could also die so I just decided funny enough I saw
my friend she was here in Dubai at that time and I checked that on Facebook and then I was like
uh how did you go to Dubai what's good in Dubai and then she told you she just took a visa
and she came so I was like you know what I'm actually lucky that I didn't have a kid back then
because I was able to make like an impulse decision within one month I was like oh my I'm going to
Dubai I took my passport look for the visa and I came to Dubai I'm the kind of person who is
I'm not really afraid to explore or see what's out there I mean like I told you before it's what
what's the worst that can happen so I just if someone is out there and they're feeling like
they can't do something they can't when it comes to work you cannot like go out out of your way
to make yourself know and you can't build your own brand I don't think you should have to worry
about that a lot of the times us as women we tend to we have a lot of things in our minds before
we actually do with do something we tend to or I think a lot like what could go wrong but if they
if I don't get a job I mean go try it out if it doesn't work out you can always go back home
anytime like before I came here my mom told me my mom is a single mom so she told me go try it out
if he doesn't work out you will come back home we will eat together and we will start again
and then we see how it goes so I don't I don't advocate for people feeling like they should
do something what I will just tell them go out there try it out what's the worst that can happen
I love that wisdom and I want more so I will mention because you spoke about social media two
times actually when you spoke about if you know new people you try to stalk them almost on social
media to see what they like what they don't like and also you spoke about your interest in
social media nowadays many women and girls feel that social media destroys their ability to feel
beautiful to feel confident because they compared themselves to models and women who are living
the jet set lifestyle in Dubai every day on a yacht and on helicopters and drinking champagne while
they think oh my god I can never be as successful I can never be as beautiful and all that what's
your advice to those women to find their inner confidence and beauty and how do you use social
media in a healthy way rather than let it mess with your mental health that's really an amazing
question now what I want to tell by fellow ladies out there it's not everything on social media
is real you will not see someone coming to post like what's what happened that's like something
wrong that's happened in their life they will only come and show you what's what is happening
nicely what's like what they want the people to see not how the situation is most of the time
so what I would like to tell the other girls out there nothing is real know yourself
know where you come from don't compare yourself your unique your love the way you are you have
your own friends you have your own click and also like when they go when when we go to social
media we tend to our share a lot of the things that are happening in our life which is not really
advisable so also when they go out there and they're trying to share out to share the experiences
it's share out limit what you're sharing limit what you're showing other people out there and just
social media is for fun it's not it's not supposed to be like something that makes you feel
bad about yourself just go out there have fun see what people are doing don't let it get into your
mind remember at the end of the day you are a happy person you are a good individual you have
your own family you have your own click you have your own friends and not everything that is out
there is real I mean for example look at the videos of people who who make like a what is it
called makeup makeup makeup videos and stuff they will not show you how it looks on an actual skin
they will show you after they've put so many filters so don't feel bad about anything just
get out there and enjoy yourself know who you are as a person because that's really important
like in everyday life know that you cannot be like the other person you cannot be like the
other people you cannot be in every click just have your own have your own space be your own
person be positive love yourself learn to appreciate yourself learn to appreciate the people around
you and then you will see that these things on social media they will not even bother you
at all I mean for example let me a lot of the things that happened should let me they don't
really bother me because I know who I am I love who I am I would not want to change anything in
myself so that's a perfect answer thank you so much Molly for participating in this project it was
my privilege and my honor to have you here I wish you success I wish you a lot of wonderful
great people in your life and I thank you again for being part of this podcast
