Episode Transcript
Hello, my name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorce mother.
She is really my superhero.
That's why it's important for me to support women, to share their uniqueness, their personalities,
perspectives and emotions about this world.
In these difficult times in human history, we need to bring the people of the world together.
And when we hear the voices of women, when we listen, to real lives of women from other countries,
we connect our cultures without differences or stereotypes, and we get inspired by their stories
to live a better life.
That's what this podcast is all about.
My guest today is Maya Slaman.
Maya is a Lebanese Belarusian girl studying biomedical sciences at King's College London.
Maya loves fashion, Latin dance, playing the piano, reading, creative writing, traveling, and blogging.
Maya, how are you today?
Hello, I'm doing very well, how are you?
I feel blessed.
I feel really in a great mood thanks to the spring weather and I'm very curious about you and
to know more about who you are as a person, so I'll begin with this nice first question.
Maya, if the people who know you best could describe your personality, what would they say about you?
So I think people would say that I'm a very ambitious person.
Like, whatever I said to my mind to, I will do anything to reach it.
Very driven, motivated. I really like to work hard and I like that when I like having my time
filled up, I don't like having my free time. I feel like if I have my free time, then I'm not doing
enough. I think they would also say I'm very caring and kind and I put other people's needs
before mine, even in times where I should be putting myself first and yeah.
Thank you. That makes me think. Someone who is driven ambitious and like you spoke about yourself,
you pursue your goals no matter what. Usually there is a clash with your part or the part of your
personality that is put in people's needs before your own because it means you care what other
people think. And often if your goals are big enough, there will be too scared for you so they
will tell you no. Don't try it. Be safe. Don't risk it. Whatever it is. So how do you combine both?
How can you be someone who's a people pleaser at the same time? Have the positive
selfishness of going after your own goals? So I think for me, I mean in the very beginning,
I used to always actually care about what people think. And over time, I learned that, you know,
and I have to do what makes me happy. Although I put other people's needs before mine,
but that doesn't necessarily mean that I neglect my own. And by putting other people first, it just
means that if they need any help or advice, like I will always be the first one to be there.
And because I have like my circle of friends, so I've like, they're very supportive to whatever I
do. And actually they motivate me to work even harder. So to separate both of them, I think
in the beginning, it was probably a struggle because there would be people that they don't want
the best for you. But with time, you know, you learn who actually supports you and who is
genuine in your life and who will push you to work harder and be your best self. So yeah, I think
at the moment, I don't have this clash because I would put people's wants before mine. But as long
as it's not affecting like my path to my goal. Thank you. That's absolutely really really
interesting. And as a woman who is driven and ambitious, I want to know, is your love,
language, caring for others and acts of service and to show to others that you care for them.
And that's what makes you happy and satisfied. Or it's something different. And your nurturing
side is just a natural instinct. Or how would you describe it?
I would say my nurturing side is more of a natural instinct. And I think it actually comes from
my mother because she was very caring and very warm to us. So I think it just comes out naturally
for me. Thank you. And what's your advice for women who might have always put other people's
interests and other people's needs before their own, which they feel maybe their
they feel they worry what if people judge them, even in a slight way, what if they don't support
them. So they stay within their comfort zone. And some of them might even feel anxiety at the
discomfort of trying something outside their comfort zone. What would be your advice for them? And what
do you do in order to stay there in that zone of growth? So I would say that in any area of life or
whichever career or any aspect, there will always be people who will try to drag you down and
not wish the best for you, who will not be supportive towards what we're working for. So in the
end of the day, you have to, in that scenario, you have to put yourself first, whether you are someone
who is just minding their own business and just living your own life, there will always be people
criticizing you. And I think at that point, that's when you have to kind of learn the difference
between putting other people's needs first and putting yourself first, because you can do both as
long as you balance it out and it doesn't affect you negatively. Thank you. And as a girl who's
mixed nationality and culture, how do you feel yourself? Do you feel your third culture kid who is
totally different from the culture of Belarus or Lebanon, your mixed, like a melting pot of multiple
places or like you spoke about your mother is your mother's culture who would more influential
on who you are or your father's or the UK's culture or the UAE or how is it within your psychology?
So I grew up my whole life in the UAE. I was born there. So I would also consider the UAE to be my home,
in terms of Lebanon and Belarus. I would consider myself both of them are like home to me
and I love both of the cultures. So yeah, I would say it's a mixture between Lebanon and Belarus and
obviously the UAE because it was my home for so many years and that's where I grew up and I made
the most memories. Thank you. And why did you choose then to go study in London? While, for example,
even in the UAE, there are so many prestigious universities and in nearby by parts where you
can visit your parents easily compared to the UK. What was attractive about it? Is it Harry Potter?
Is it your love for the previous queen? Is it something else you wanted a totally different place
that is colder and much more culturally different than the UAE or what attracted you to that?
No, actually it wasn't the Harry Potter or the Queen, but first of all I wanted a change because
growing up in the UAE it's really hot and the weather stays the same the whole year and I really
wanted to experience living life in Europe and outside the Middle East. So that was kind of one of
my reasons and then the other reason is because like I am a very ambitious person so I always
want the best and the UK has like the best schools in the whole world so that's also why I pick to
come here. Thank you and I know you're interested in fashion, in beauty etc. How do you create
your outfit or your look or even your makeup in order to express your personality? Is it your mood
that you wake up in a mood and you want to reflect it through colors that resonate with that?
Is it that someday you feel like Marlene Monroe and other day you feel like another celebrity or
a character from a book or a movie and you want to embody that? Or how would a girl or a person
who's interested in fashion but they don't really understand how to express their unique personality
through wit choose their outfit for the day or create their style? I think for me my love of fashion
came from when I was younger when I was like a small like child small girl and I would see my
mom getting dressed up for work and going to work and like the pretty like clothes and she was
always wearing colorful clothes so that's actually where my love of color came from and in terms
of how I choose my outfits every single day and my look I think it I don't really think about it
deeply it's just whatever mood I wake up in whichever color I'm feeling that's how I pick it
basically thank you and I want to know more now you lived all your life in the UAE you made
friends for years over there and now you went to a new culture how does it work let's say there
is a girl who's excited about going to college or university in a new country but she's worried
will I make new friends will they be real friends or just shallow acquaintances do I need to talk
an approach and initiate with people will they come to me what's your experience making friends
in the UK and what would you recommend to any girl or woman who is going to a new city maybe a new
institution or a new country in order to not be alone and to build bonds with people that feel
warm and deep actually before I came to the UK I was also thinking about oh how will I
leave my friends how will I make new friends um because you know when you are in school it's
just like so easy to make friends and it's like you your friends with whoever is in your class
so that was actually one of my biggest worries but when I came here I realized it's much more
simple than I thought and especially here people are very friendly and you kind of have to have
the mindset that you are not the only one that's going to a new country there will be other
people that are also leaving their home that are leaving their family and they also want to make
new friends so you have to think of it in a way that it's not just you who is trying to you know
intrude um and like a friend group it's like everyone's goal coming to university they want
to make friends they want to meet new people so you kind of all get along and it's actually it was
actually very easy thank you and to you especially with your cultural mix etc what does it
mean for you to be a woman what is the energy of femininity how do you experience it and how would
you explain it in words although it's more to be felt so that people nowadays where there is
confusion what's a man what's a woman could know your opinion of that energy that makes you feel
very feminine so I feel very privileged to be a woman actually because you know women are
much more impressive than people would think or expect there were always misconceptions about
women's abilities and actually nowadays I think like a woman's power is being shown to the world
more and more every day because there are so many great women and inspiring women out there
so yeah I feel very happy to be a woman I encourage and I support that very very much
and you as someone entering the fashion world somehow how do you go about finding your voice
you know they say photographers will have a voice influencers will have a voice
which is the unique way that you express your message and people sometimes that take them
a long time to discover what is their voice some of them they copy others what they like about
others until they find their uniqueness some other people they just meditate in a cave in order
to understand themselves for you how do you go about this journey of finding your unique voice
in a world where there are so many people who are also competing for attention and to inspire
and share with others I think finding your own voice it is difficult but it also comes very naturally
and it is not wrong to be inspired from others obviously it is very wrong to copy what others do
but getting inspiration from other women or other people around the world this is like completely
fine and actually I think through that you find your own voice because you get inspiration
from one person and you get inspiration from another person and you kind of experiment with that
and that's how you find your own voice thank you and speaking about friends what kinds of people do
you seem to gravitate towards the most are there people in this world that you feel yes this is my
kind of person these are my tribe no matter the location is it energetic that you feel you resonate
with them in a some kind of metaphysical spiritual level is it the conversation where you don't
have to think and you find so many commonalities is it just that they are I have a background from
Lebanon or UAE or Belarus it's like two strangers meeting in London and you're like yes we're
similar let's go or how do you decide on or feel that feeling of belonging of yes this is my
kind of person for me finding friends is about if the conversation flows really well and if it's
just easy conversation I also really like spontaneous people so I'm a spontaneous person I'm
organized but at the same time I love you know doing like experiencing new things even if
it's like unplanned things so people who you know are up for the adventure or you know they want
to enjoy and you know just have the same interests so those are the people I kind of gravitate
towards more thank you so much and you spoke about being someone who can sacrifice your own needs
for others almost always or at least very often yet you still have that independence that
ability to be spontaneous to be joyful what is your recommendation maybe to some girls or women
who feel they were too kind and they got disappointed or heartbroken in some people who may be
abused or their kindness and now they become close they don't trust others they don't begin
any new interaction with trust but with closeness so that they open themselves because
the best people in this world if you are beginning with closeness and with worrying whether
they will betray you or disappoint you that will leave and so you lose a lot of good people in
the process so how do you heal yourself or your recommendation for other women to heal any heart
break whether in love or not related to people that they were kind to who did not reciprocate.
So actually that's a very nice question. I went through experiences similar to that so where my
kindness was taken for granted and you know not appreciated so I think the best way to deal with
that is obviously to take time to heal on your own and surround yourself with people who love
you and support you and also find new interests and hobbies and in regards to people leaving and you
losing good people as a result of that I think if someone will leave you when you are in a state
of vulnerability then they are not the right friend or the right person for you because if they are
really supportive and genuine they would stick by your side through the ups and downs and no
matter what I understand thank you Maya very very much and you have chosen some other place you
said you wanted to experience Europe nowadays if you had the unlimited possibility to live
any place in the world you could live in Bali in Maldives and Hollywood in New York
or stay in London or any other place what would be a location maybe Italy that reflects your
personality where you feel if you live there it will be totally in harmony with who you are
someplace where you feel yes this is my spot I wish I could live here forever actually I would
say London mainly because so London has two different sides to it there is like the west side
which is a very like simple and like kind of classy area and then there is like the east side which is
more like kind of street and like hipster and so I love like the contrast between the two sides
because you know it's like you go to one end and it's a completely different experience than the
other end and I think that really you know reflects on me because you know some days I'm like
I'm very reserved and then some days I'm very outgoing and I want to always go out and see people
and even with my fashion is like some days I'm very like minimal and other days I'm you know
kind of going crazy with the colors and experimenting with patterns. Thank you so much for sharing
your voice your perspective and to finish this episode. Is there any lesson or something that
you have learned maybe because of living in a new country or simply because of your growth and
maturity and evolution about how to live happier how to live better things you want to change
or implement in your life that you can share with other women to inspire them with whatever
lesson you have learned. Yeah I think you know if you do move to a new country don't be afraid
don't be shy to go out to meet people to try new things it's all a part of life and you only
you know you live life once so you have to make the most of it and in regards to you know people
being supportive around you you can never really you can choose who's around you but also you can
never choose who stays and who leaves and if someone wants to leave you and not be by your
side anymore you just have to let them go because the right person or the right friend will always
stick by your side no matter what whether you're going through like a horrible like period of time
or whether you're doing your best. I agree one billion percent thank you Maya for really participating
in this podcast sharing your truth inspiring other women it's my privilege and my honor to
have you here in this podcast. Thank you so much it was a pleasure talking to you I really
enjoyed this podcast. You are welcome.
