E290 Leila Alieva

Hello, my name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorced mother. She is really my superhero. That's why it's important for me to support women to share their uniqueness, their personalities, perspectives, and emotions about this world. Too many women in this world feel alone. They worry about the judgment of others and they struggle with self-worth. But when they listen to this podcast where ambitious women share their voices and their stories, many women will feel inspired to live a life of freedom and to overcome all limitations. They will feel empowered to heal their anxiety and to build their dream life and ambitious women to give them strength and to encourage their success. That's what this podcast is all about. My guest today is Leila Alieva. Leila lives in Dubai. She feels safe and happy to be a resident in the UAE. Leila is a professional dancer. She studied classic choreography and she has been dancing since she was four years old and has been a belly dancer for more than 15 years. Originally from Moscow, Russia, Leila is also a graduate engineer, concentrator of ores of precious and non-ferrous metals. Leila, how are you today? Hello, guys. I'm very happy that Aziz invites me to his podcast. And I really hope we to help us to feel ourselves more happy in our lives. I'm honored, I'm lucky, I feel privileged to have you here. And I'm very curious about you as a woman and about your story and your journey. So I'll begin with this nice first question. If your friends could describe your personality, Leila, what would they say about you? Oh, this is very interesting question. I think I should ask my friends about that. I would love if they would tell about me that I'm really a very kind person, that I'm really a very good friend and this is what I really want to be for my friends, that I can share with them my happiness and I can give them my love and my happiness and let them feel supported by me. Because I think this is very much important when your friends is your family also. I understand and I agree. Human connection and friendship and family are very, very important. And what do they add to your life? I mean, do you feel more safe When you're connected with those friends and family, is it that you feel supported? So when you're outside making your big dreams come true, you don't feel too stressed because you always think, I have a family that loves me, friends who love me. Or what is your connection and the importance of those human relationships for you? For me, I'm a very extroverted person. For me, it's very important to feel love and connection and understanding from people around me and support from my family. I really can't suffer if I have any misunderstanding with my close people. And I will always try to, if we have even a minimum misunderstanding, to clarify everything. Because I love when I'm surrounded by love, by support, by understanding. And I always want to give to my family and to my friends the same from my side. And I hope I am very much successful in that. I hope so too, and I believe you are. And then I will ask you, what was your journey of finding your confidence, finding your power as a woman? And what's your advice for other women who maybe are struggling, maybe they look at social media and they don't feel beautiful like the girls in the photos or they worry if they make a mistake that their parents will be disappointed and things like that. Aziz, thank you for a question. This is a very interesting question and honestly very important for me. As a dancer and as a model, I was invited in one very famous Russian TV show about plastic surgery. You know, I think a lot of women who work in this profession, in modeling or dancing, everybody says like, and everybody's thinking, they are so beautiful and they're so confident about how they looks like. But honestly, I believe that most of them from time to time, they have this problem and they suffer about lack of self-confidence. They always try to improve themselves. Some of them for their work, some of them for their private life. Because they think that if they will change something in their face or in their body, it will help them to be more successful. It will help them to have more money, more successful in their private life, to have love for how they look like. But I believe that everything starts with how you feel inside. If you feel yourself confident and beautiful, everybody feels the same and everybody will feel the same energy of beauty and confidence from you. And honestly, beauty comes from within, from who you are and how do you feel. and until you will feel that you are beautiful, until you feel that you are self-confident, no any plastic surgery, no person from outside can give you that. So everything starts from you. First, maybe it sounds very much usual, like you can hear it from everybody, But this is very simple things and this is how things it is. Your self-confidence, your happiness starts from you. So my advice from all women from all around the world, try to find, because honestly it's very personal, try to find what makes you feel happy. One people happy, one extroverted people happy from find connection and love and happiness and support from people around them. Some women happy to find maybe hobby, maybe some activity, maybe walking, maybe to chill out alone on the beach near the sea. So try to find what makes you feel happy and confident and improve that. So maybe this advice is very simple. Maybe you can hear that very often, but honestly it's really the only one thing that works. I agree 100% and thank you so much Leila for sharing this. And so to ask you, as a dancer and as a choreographer, I know it's both you for your job, you have to look as good as you can and therefore I understand the difficulty and how hard it can be. At the same time, is there something about dance that makes you feel even more confident, even more sensual, even more as a woman, and so maybe dancing for that girls learn to dance and women, is that a good way for them to build the confidence? What's your perspective on that? Oh my dear, dancing is really the best, I believe that dancing is really the best way for women to feel themselves really beautiful and confident. It's first of all, it's just very happy and very healthy. And it's just amazing way to have fun. Okay, but also I believe that honestly, it's very good job for women, because it's very feminine. And it's not only about money, but you really every woman can be in this profession. I heard that not in every society, when a woman is dancing, this profession, not in every society is respected. But since ancient times, since ancient Greece, dancing is an art, okay? And it can really bring to every woman feeling of beauty and self-confidence, which is very much important. That's a great answer and you're an expert on this. So it matters very, very much. And then to know even more, I understand how important your family is to you, your friends, but now you're a resident far away. How was the adaptation to the new country, the new weather, the new culture, and how do you take care of your mental health when maybe you can miss your family? Thank you for your question, Aziz. I really love your questions because you're just open so important subject. Because I have been traveling to Dubai, to Emirates, also with my parents, since I'm a very little girl, I never had any problem with cultural adaptation. Also, I love the climate. I love hot and wet weather. It affects my body, my breath, my skin, my hair very well. So I don't have any problem even in summer. This country is really, I feel like my second home. The only one thing that I really miss, I miss my parents and I miss my friends who are now in Russia. But I travel a lot so for me it's also I'm not suffering too much because I can meet my family, I can meet my friends and we talk almost every day so no any problem, everything good. Inshallah. Inshallah, thank you. I understand that fully and completely and to ask you even more because you spoke about that. Of course, for your job, the way you look is important for your job, for your work, for your future. At the same time, do you get some difficulties because of it? Are there some people who are jealous or judge you and they think, oh, maybe a woman who's beautiful doesn't have brains or anything like that? Do you have such stereotypes that you faced and what's your opinion on them and how to overcome them in society, because I understand you're a very intelligent woman, but some people judge others not by their soul, but by some outside impression. Or I really love your questions. Yes, this is very much true. Unfortunately, I had all my life, a lot of bad comments, a lot of attacks are from both sides, from women and from men, especially when I'm in Russia, because in Russia people are much more straightforward. If they had bad thoughts, they never feel shy to share with you these bad thoughts. Yes, it was before when I really suffered from the bad comments, It made me feel so much unhappy, you cannot imagine. I was crying, I spent so many times, a lot of time by thinking how they think about me, like so bad. I'm not like that. I don't have nothing bad in my mind. And there, yes, of course, a lot of people, they are very rude and they judge your life. They judge how you look like, they judge your lips, your hair, your nails, everything. And I was really so much stressed about that. I was thinking, but okay, if you don't like it, just don't look. Why are you paying so much attention how I look like? Because it's how I... First of all, when you are dancing or where you are modeling, you need to adjust the criteria of that. You cannot look like just for a girl from the street. you need to perform for show, you need to look special, you need to attach other people's sides, okay? You must create a wow effect. So it's completely different criteria for showgirls, for dancers, for performance. And of course, when someone can see you on the street, they can think of something bad, but in what we're living in our very, in our world and so many different people. Now everybody can express themselves every time when I have bad comments. Now, every time when I have judging, like people telling something bad about me. Even now, I thought like, why are you thinking like that? So many, we live in a modern world, in so open world, in so big world, everybody can look and everybody can think how they like it, how they like to look like. Even I think I heard over already everything, even I think I can now don't pay too much attention, I can now not react on that bad comments on judging. But even now it's touched my heart. So what do you want to say? I want to say to all people all around the world, please be more tolerant. Please be more tolerant. We all are different. If you don't like something, just don't look. Just don't give your time to that. Pay attention to what is important for you. Pay attention to what makes you happy. Pay attention to your family, to your friends, And don't waste your time. Don't waste your energy to judge people. And don't give your energy for bad. And our world will be much more kind, much more safe, and much more happy place for all of us. That's it. Thank you for that. I love how much wisdom you have. And let's ask about it in a different way. You said even now comments that are rude, and I hate that and that's not acceptable. You're a human being and a woman, you should dress in any way you want, have the wow factor in any way you want, and it helps you and your big goals, so it's a good thing. Let's say even girls who in the past few years, when they are teenagers, they grew up with social media and Instagram and then there is a pandemic and they stayed at home, so they don't really know how the world is, but they think, oh if I am not really a celebrity, then I'm so ugly and many teenager girls are depressed. What is to you the solution? Like if you could go back to your life when you were much younger and you were crying because of the judgment of people, what advice would you give yourself so that you remember your uniqueness, your power as a woman, and so that you heal and not really worry too much about their hurtful comments. Because in many ways, people should be tolerant, but because we cannot change them, so we have to try to be stronger so that they don't affect us in the same way. This is a very interesting question. When you are a teenager, you are very vulnerable. And everything can affect you. Everything can hurt you. My advice, you know, when you're given any advice, you must be very careful also, because because if this advice, I don't want that any advice can harm someone. So what I can say, like I want to say something that really can be helpful, but from the other side, not hurt no one and not be harmful. So what can I say? When you are a teenager, Just try to understand if you feel unhappy, it will not last forever, the new day comes. And just let this day pass. This is the first. If you are upset, if you are crying, if you are down, just let this day pass, because tomorrow will be another day and sun will rise for you. This is the first. The second, honestly, to be confident, you must improve yourself. try to learn something that is, try to choose a subject that's really interesting for you, that makes you happy. Try to choose this subject, try to find it by trying different activities, okay? And when you found really that you are good in, improve that. This is the only way for self-confidence. Then you will feel that, when you will feel that you're better and better and it will give you self-confidence and happiness that will help you to improve the self even more. Try to surround you by only by people who support and give you positive vibes and good energy that not only give good from you but also it's like share with you the same positive vibes and It's basic advice, but too many people forget it and they need to remember it. And Leila, to finish, what are your future goals? Like right now, you're taking care of your career, you're taking care of your family, you're living your best life, I hope so, and I encourage that. Are there some things that you're developing, working on for the next step in your life, anything that your goals that you are progressing on? It's very interesting. First of all, I really love to travel. I want to visit and touch as more cultures as I can because that inspires me. I love to communicate with people. I love to meet different people. I love to meet different cultures. I want to pay more attention to that. I really want now to concentrate. I travel a lot now, but I want to travel to completely different cultures, to meet more different people. This is first. The second, I want to create my family. I want to be my own family. And I want to concentrate on my own family, on my husband, my kids. This is what I really want. So maybe I will not be too much concentrated of my career, but I will be much more concentrated of my family because this is a very important part of women's life. And I really feel that they need to concentrate on that and pay more attention to that. Thank you so much, Leyla. It was my privilege and my honor to share your voice, to include you in this podcast. It's absolutely an honor for me. I encourage all your success. I encourage your own family dreams and also existing family happiness and for you to visit all the cultures and the countries that make you feel excited and happy every day. Thank you. Thank you so much.