Episode Transcript
Hello, my name is Aziz and I'm the son of a divorced mother.
She is really my superhero.
That's why it's important for me to support women to share their uniqueness, their personalities,
perspectives, and emotions about life.
Too many women in this world feel alone.
They worry about the judgment of others and they struggle with their mental health.
But when they listen to the Rare Girls podcast where empowered women share their voices
and tell their stories, many women will feel inspired to live a life of freedom and to
overcome all insecurities. They will feel. It is a safe space to find their confidence,
to remember their unique beauty and to feel their self-worth. And they will connect with
the sisterhood of rare girls who encourage their success and support their dreams.
That's what this podcast is all about. My guest today is Wadzanai Gute. Wadzanai
is the first girl from Zimbabwe in this podcast,
and is a second year software engineering student
at the University of Wollongong, Malaysia campus.
And she likes to spend her time in every possible way
with friends and family.
Wadsanae, how are you today?
I'm good, thanks, how are you Aziz?
I feel blessed, very happy to have you today
and curious to know more.
So I'll begin with this nice first question,
which is, what's an eye if your friends
and the people who know you most and love you best
could describe your personality?
What would they say about you?
I think they would say that I'm a bit tough,
but once you get to know me,
I'm a very free, friendly person
and I'm always there for my friends.
I love that.
Tell me more about it because being tough,
but once people get to know you, they know you're free, open-minded, softer than they expected,
etc. Do you believe that that toughness comes from shyness or from something where you feel
you need to protect yourself from some people, or it's just an attitude that you picked up
along the way, or how did it form and develop? Well, I've met a lot of people in my life,
like even being friends with some people
and not everyone who is around you
always has like your best interest at heart.
So I kind of like just put this wall up
to kind of just filter the people
that I let into my life.
So I'm not very easily approachable,
but once I get to know a person
and see where they are coming from,
if they have my best interest at heart,
I will project the same energy
and I am a very loyal friend
when once I once I am sure of like how the person is and what their intentions are so yeah I would
say it's mainly because of the other people that I've met in my life that did not have like my
best interest at heart so I kind of limit the people I let close to me. I understand and how
did this work for you in Malaysia because you're going to a whole new country and therefore
as someone who is displaced somehow far away from family and those you love,
if you are tough, it becomes harder to make friendships.
So how did you go through that process? What did you do?
Well, in as much as I would like to say I am tough, it's not like I'm mean.
I'm actually a very nice person. Like I'm good with new people.
It's just that there is a stage that I will put you.
I won't put you as close. You are there.
I will be nice to you. I'm not going to be mean to people.
So making friends was not hard, but I just really took my time to really see how people were.
And I made like my first actual friend after like two months, I may say.
But that doesn't mean like before I didn't have friends. I did have friends.
But just knowing that this person has my back and I'll have theirs, it was after a couple of months.
I understand. And in addition to studying and spending all that time on your education,
how do you take care of your well-being, life balance, mental health? How is a typical week
within the life of what Zanae now in a foreign country in order for her to not
burn out and just be studying constantly?
Well, I do like school does get tough at times, and it's very depressing.
It's very hard, especially not being around my family, but I do try and call them as
much as I can to just kind of vent about the things that I will be going through so
that they can just keep me grounded, give me the motivation I need to keep going.
And most of the time when I feel like everything is just a lot,
I kind of like just take time to myself. I don't mix with people a lot.
I just spend my time maybe watching movies and just take the time to feel whatever it is
I'll be feeling from the pressure of school and being far away from my family.
I understand. At the same time, how was that change of scenery going from Africa to Asia?
Did you find it difficult that there was an adaptation period, a culture clash?
What did you notice that maybe was normal in Zimbabwe that was not happening in
Malaysia or the opposite?
How was it to take yourself, a girl from Zimbabwe and put her in Malaysia?
How was that adaptation situation?
Well, from the moments that I was even still at home, I was so anxious.
I was so anxious and when I got here, it was during COVID and I had to stay in quarantine
for like two weeks, I think.
So during that time, I couldn't see a lot, like there wasn't that much of a difference
because I literally just got from the airport and went to my hotel.
So during that time, I was just spending my time, I was attending classes online,
I was watching movies, I was talking to my family.
So during that period, it was kind of like just the same.
And then once I got out of quarantine,
fortunately, like my school does have like
a lot of Africans.
So I managed to fit in, in terms of like having friends.
But then I wouldn't say like,
yes, they are like culture differences and everything,
but the people, they're very nice.
And I never felt like that homesick,
like I need to be home, I need to go back home
because I don't like this here or anything like Malaysia,
it was just very nice for me when I got here.
So yeah, except for the weather, of course,
that's a bit different.
It's very hot here, but other than that,
the transition was not very, it wasn't bad at all.
Thank you.
And why did you choose specifically the subject
and the field you want to study?
What motivated you to do that?
What was your inspiration?
Well, for as long as I can remember, I did enjoy doing things that had to do with computers.
Like, even in high school, I was doing computers as my practical subject, and it's one subject
that was actually interesting for me.
So when I got to a point where I wanted to, like where I had to choose what I wanted
to pursue in college, like in university, that was like one idea that I had like
off the top of my mind like I didn't even have to think about it because it's just something that's
actually interesting for me to do although it's actually um hard it's a bit challenging but
I do enjoy doing it like it gives me that excitement especially when I'm actually learning
how to do the things and I'm getting good at them yeah. Thank you I understand this and
to know even more because you spoke about in the beginning when you meet people you put them
through a phase before you decide to make them part
of your life, what are you looking for?
Maybe it can be good advice to other women,
like what characteristics or green flags
or maybe even red flags do you look for
so that you become selective and choose the right people?
Well, I don't think like right now
I can really just categorize like,
okay, this is a green flag, okay, this is a red flag.
But what I can say is that you need to take your time
with people, you need to take your time.
There are even people that I knew that were very close,
but that's just because like you haven't gotten
to a point where the relationship between you
and that person is gonna be tested.
At some point, the relationship is gonna be tested
and that's when you see what a person is gonna choose.
Are they gonna prioritize you?
Are they gonna have your back
when they need to have your back?
So I just feel like you just need to take your time
when forming relationships with new people,
take your time. At some point, even if someone is putting up,
like is putting out an act, at some point that will be tested.
And it'll be very easy for you to know that this person has my
back or not.
I understand. And you have, as you said, you went to Malaysia
and began your education during COVID. I could argue and a
lot of people do that many women and girls who grew up
and were in high school or beginning university during
It was a time of isolation, a time that might have reduced their social skills, made them
feel isolated.
Do you agree with this?
Do you think that during those isolation periods, during COVID times and pandemic, et cetera,
that that was something that can cause you and many women a level of shyness and extra
introversion?
Well, I don't think so specifically because, well, this is for me particularly, because
I've always been a person who enjoys spending their time alone, like I do enjoy spending
time with my friends, with my family, but I also do not mind being alone. So I wouldn't
say that it was a very hard time for me in terms of like being social, because I
wasn't that social in the beginning. So it didn't really affect me in a terrible way.
But then when it comes to school, what I would say was the problem was just keeping up because
you have like all these distractions when you're learning from a place where you're
not physically present with the lecture. So there's just all these distractions like
we were even traveling during times that we were supposed to be in class. So that
was the only issue, like, that was the only problem because,
you know, people were even allowed to now start traveling,
like locally, of course, before classes got back to fully
physical. So I just feel like it was the big problem was just a
lot of distractions. But in terms of like, social skills,
I don't think it affected anything, because it was kind
of just the same as the person that I was before.
I understand. Thank you for that. And about the food, because Asian food is very different
compared to your country and African food often is much more delicious and spicy,
or spicy in a different way because Asian food can be spicy in a very specific way.
How did you deal with that adaptation? Did you call your parents, tell them,
send me some African spices that I can cook myself,
or did you get used to the rice
and the different Asian meals, or how was it?
Well, in terms of being spicy,
I grew up, growing up, my dad liked spicy food,
and we would always be eating spicy food at home.
But I did go through a very hard time during quarantine
because we had meal preps that would prepare our food
for us, it would come in these lunchboxes,
it was like local food. So that was a really hard time for me because I couldn't even order food from
outside. I just had to deal with whatever I was given. And some of the stuff I didn't know,
I didn't even know what it was. Like I would actually just be sitting there and be like,
what is this? And I would be so hungry and it would just be tasting another way. That was
just a very hard time. But once I got out of quarantine, I was able to go to the different
grocery stores and just find things that are closer
to the food that I am used to.
But yeah, it's not that bad.
It was very, it was really just bad during quarantine.
But after that, I found a way to like adapt
and get a way that works for me with the food.
Thank you.
Also, you said that you like to be around yourself
and with yourself.
Do you feel or describe yourself as a confident woman
Or do you struggle sometimes with feeling self-worth, self-confidence, etc.?
Well, as of today, I would say I am a pretty confident person and I know my self-worth.
But throughout my life, I think I can just think of like two times where I did struggle with self-confidence.
That would be like when I was younger.
Like, don't get me wrong, my parents were amazing, my siblings were amazing, but it
would just be like these other relatives who would like make comments about like the
way I look.
Like I was, I'm a very slim person, like I'm a slim person, right?
And when I was younger, I was actually very small.
So it would just be like all those comments.
And then when people like older people say these things, it's kind of like, oh,
she's just a kid.
She won't even remember.
She probably doesn't even care.
But like that was an issue for me for a while, but then I kind of like just grew into my
body and I love my body so much right now.
And another time was in high school, I went to a mixed sex school.
I think that's what they call them, yeah.
And it was really just a place where people would make fun of each other for very petty
stuff, like very basic things, like people might make fun of you just because you want
maybe try a new sport or you want to join a new club or you want to try public so it was something
that would make people make fun of you so I feel like it's something that like that mentality
it's something that I carried with me for maybe two years after that like it would be hard for
me to just do basic things like maybe even post on social media it was just a whole issue
like that. But as time went on, as I got around like new people who were like, who are just like
positive and say positive things about you and make you want to be your best version, like it
really helped me. And now I'm in a very good place, like I would describe myself as a confident
person. I love that. I'm so happy for you. And then to define it even more, what is the
of confidence for you if you could explain it and do you have any advice
for other women and girls so that they will find their confidence and overcome
things like you spoke about the high school criticism and bullying and all
that yeah I would say that for me like being confident is being able to do
whatever you want to do and not be afraid of what anybody's gonna say
because at the end of the day a person might just say something that
say, but it's not even going to affect you. Like it won't even have an impact on whatever
it is that you are doing. And the advice that I would give like other women that struggle with
self-confidence is that the people around you are a very important thing. Like you need to pay
attention to the people that you keep around you. There are people that are always there to
bring you down like they can say things as jokes and you may not even take them like
seriously or to heart but subconsciously like those things will stick and at some point
you want to do something and then you remember something that somebody said about you or
something they said about what you want to do and it would really like just kind of
hold you back but if you are on people that are just always positive saying positive
positive things about you and pushing you to be like the best version of yourself that you can be.
That is very helpful like I know it sounds kind of corny or I don't know but it's a thing like
subconsciously the things that the people around you say they will really affect your
confidence so you really need to be um careful of that. Thank you Adzanai. It was my privilege
and my honor to have you in this podcast to share your voice, your story. I wish you peace
of mind and happiness as you finish your education
and to fulfill all of your dreams.
Thank you so much.
I'm actually very glad you reached out to me.
At first, I was actually like, should I go on with this?
But then I was like, why not?
Usually, sometimes when I'm going through something
or I'm struggling with something,
can be just the smallest things
that I just hear, maybe a podcast or a song or a post
someone make that word, like just make me feel better. So if I can say something here that
someone is going to listen to and it helps them, it was really my pleasure. 100%.
