Episode Transcript
Hello, my name is Aziz, and I'm the son of a divorced mother.
She's really my superhero.
That's why it's important for me to support women to share their uniqueness, their personalities,
perspectives, and emotions about life.
Too many women in this world feel alone.
They worry about the judgment of others and they struggle with their mental health.
But when they listen to the Rare Girls podcast where empowered women share their voices and
tell their stories, many women will feel inspired to live a life of freedom and overcome
all insecurities they will feel.
It is a safe space to find their confidence to remember their unique beauty and to feel
their self-worth, and they will connect with the sisterhood of rare girls who encourage
their success and support their dreams.
That's what this podcast is all about.
My guest today is Diorah Holson.
Diorah is a social media and marketing specialist.
She lives in Belgium and she is completing a bachelor in business and starting her MBA
with a specialization in strategic business management.
Her hobbies include reading, gym, studying, and design.
Diora, how are you today?
Well, thank you so much, first of all, for having me and I'm very, very happy
do yet have this podcast with you. Today I'm, well, to be honest, fine. Not extremely happy
since it's already a second week in Belgium when we are having just rains, so it's a
bit sad. But otherwise, other than that, it's very good. How about you?
I feel blessed. I hope that you will bring sunshine again to Belgium. And I'm very
is about you as a person and as a woman, so I'll begin with this nice first question, which is
Diora, if your friends and the people who know you well could describe your personality, what
would they say about you? Actually, I even, yeah, as you said, since I'm a social media
specialist and I'm also having my small blog, and once I even asked this question to my
followers and to my audience, what do they think about me, especially those who knows
mean person. And everyone's saying that I'm very positive and open and very friendly. And I think
this is this is also how I can describe myself. So even though I'm not, I've never kind of
considered myself so because I never wasn't like having a goal in my mind that I would like to be
so, to be honest, even other way around because always some people who are more
closed and co-motivated and inspired me. So I was like, ah, I wanted to be like that or like that.
But actually, it is what it is. So I would say so. And I'm very communicative. It's very easy for me
to start a conversation, to find the common topics with the people. And the people also
say I'm very creative. Because, you know, every time when there's something going on with
design, will it be like the design of that, I don't know, the website or the design of the
invitation letter or something like this, they will always come to me, since they say that I
have a good sense of aesthetics, which again, I believe myself, about myself, that I'm really
far from mastery of it, but it's still very pleasing to hear that. So I think it will be
two main characteristics about me? Thank you. I love that. And I want to know more.
There are many women who, especially when they go to a new country, maybe because of work or
study, they feel isolated. They think, oh, if I go and start conversations with people,
maybe I cannot find common ground. Maybe they will reject me. What's your advice to those
women? And what makes you feel okay and comfortable with speaking to strangers and new people? Well,
most women are scared of that. Well, this is, I can say that in general, it's not even only when
you go to another country, sometimes even when you're just in your country, but changing your
experience, like going to some new, maybe the hobby club or university, college, whatsoever,
school, work. So, it's a very common thing, actually. And for me, I would say the only real
thing which can help you with the only solution is the experience and practice. Otherwise, you can
learn as much as possible, you can learn the language, you can read books about communication,
networking, whatever, but if you are not start talking, you won't get it. You won't
became more open or kind of even brave to talk to strangers.
When I just came to Belgium, it was an absolutely new experience for me.
I was before in a somewhere abroad, but I never was in a situation when I had to talk
to strangers, to talk to people from that country.
And I remember that I got a goal for me because I moved here to Belgium to study
at the university.
So my goal was like first month is to every day I'm going to the university and every day to meet 10 new people.
So it's literally I just came to university, was coming to the university and start talking and get at least 10 contacts every day.
And I could start conversation first.
Firstly, it was hard, but then when you're doing it's like even 10 times a day, it's much, much easier.
you start conversation with just saying like, Oh, I like your
outfit. Or if you're in a one class or one context, kind of,
kind of, then you can ask about some common topics like, Oh,
do you know? Do you like this class? Are you are you good in
math? Or, or I don't know if it's a workspace, you can ask,
Oh, do you do you know if the coffee is good in this in
this coffee machine? Or maybe, you know, like some good
cafe, etc. Because basically, when you are normally you're
people in the same context where you are. School, work, hobby, party, etc. Or even
like if it's some maybe you need to do some administrative things it's still
like you have some common things and you can start with them because it's much
much easier. So it will be my kind of advice just first of all start and do
not think much because also the thing is that we are very selfish and
we think that everyone is thinking about us so if we will like you know this anxiety when you are
like saying something for example and then like days after that you're thinking oh my god i go
to that or they looked at me like that no people are actually you are selfish of thinking
but not selfish in a bad way you know it's just like more like a joke i don't want to abuse
someone. But you are used to think about yourself a lot. But
and others are thinking about themselves a lot. They do not
think about you every day, every second or something is very
natural. At the end of the day,
I agree 100% and it's very important because other people
are the connections that you can have in order to make
friendships open a new possibilities in life and just
people are fascinating and very, very interesting.
And I want to ask about your creativity and design aspect
because you seem to have like instincts for design.
Is this something you developed over time?
How was your creative process?
Do you take walks in nature or maybe the gym inspires you
or how does it work for you?
It's something, you know, as my mama always say
that I'm very talented and creative
But I think every mom and dad tell this to their children.
I was, from my childhood, I was like always drawing.
My mother was always getting me to some different clubs, et cetera.
So I was, from childhood, I was developing this.
And after that, but what I think is like with the creativity, it never has to be
a pressure.
You cannot develop your creativity under pressure.
You can develop it, since it's a skill.
It also can be a talent and it's very nice, but it's not that if you're born without it, you cannot develop it.
You can develop it with some practice and so on.
And with me, I think I just, since my specialization also not very creative,
to be honest, which is like business economics, it can be, but it's not that like art whatsoever.
So I, after that, just my life brought me to the moment when I decided to do it myself in a way.
I just started to learn more about design and I like to make the designs for like
for social media, for example, a bit for the websites, I'm still developing it, but I like it
as a process. So, and to kind of encourage it, everyone should really find their own
way for it. For me, for example, it's listening to music and walking at the same time, because
I'm not, for someone it can be meditation, but for me it really doesn't work, because it doesn't
think because the main idea of the meditation normal is that you are like do not think or
like focusing on one thing but for me it doesn't doesn't work like this and another thing
is actually which is very weird but I think it's even even well let me let me say correctly
this surname because it's very famous that Einstein I think it's so he was saying that
the best I think it was his quote that the best ideas are coming to you when you
when he was in a shower, I think so. And this is for me works as well. And even though showering
for hours is a bit expensive thing, but still it's the moment when your brain is just free or
out of some, yeah, you know, you cannot just like start watching TikToks, I don't know,
in a shower or something like this. And the same I'm trying to do with walks because I'm
walking and and my mind is kind of free and it can develop anything it can the imagination can
work in any any side kind of any way it wants to so i think the main idea is just to find the place
when you can free your mind will it be the meditation taking shower walking nature or whatever
But it's just the place where the activity, when you're not thinking,
OK, I have to, I don't know, pay my bills.
And after that, I have to walk my dog or I have to prepare dinner, blah, blah, blah.
So you just have to find this exact moment and you will understand it.
Just try different things.
I agree 100 percent.
When you are in that state where you are more dreamy and not stressed out,
a lot of creativity comes.
And you are someone involved in social media a lot.
One, I have two questions for you.
So one, what potential did you see in social media
that made you want to focus on it,
to become a social media and marketing manager?
And two, how do you think women should take care
of their mental health, especially teenage girls
when they compare themselves to women who are living
the jet set lifestyle in Ibiza or Miami or Dubai
and full of Photoshop and they think,
oh, wow, my life is bad and I'm ugly
and they don't see their unique beauty.
So they feel depressed.
So one, the potential and the benefit you see
in social media more than any other ways
for the growth, branding, business.
And second, how to protect yourself and other women
maybe from challenges for mental health.
So with the first question,
I'm pretty sure that everyone heard this,
like, oh, there's so much potential in the social media,
which is true.
The thing just that you have to use it right
and use it correctly and use it mindfully
because if you will just post something
whereas you're just a person or an expert
or you are a business or you have your business,
if you will just post one story in 10 days,
well, it will have no things.
The same thing if you will, I don't know,
to the gym once for one hour in the whole year. You won't get muscles or you won't lose weight
whatsoever, whatever your goal was. So, this is the thing which really needs discipline and
consistency, but it has a lot of potential because this is the thing which now is very
available. You do not have to have millions of money to be able to have Instagram, Facebook,
Twitter, what's ever, just internet. So it's really kind of balancing the chances because before,
you know, not even so long ago, like, take, I don't know, maybe 10 years, 20 years ago,
people to become famous and to develop their personal brands, or they're just brand of their
business, they had to, for example, pay for the TV, or they had to find very good connections.
Whereas right now, you can just start posting, you just take your phone and doesn't have
to be the most expensive phone, I don't know, iPhone, the latest model, and you just start
posting and you have just to do it mindfully, to develop the strategy to understand what
you want to do and the thing is what is very good for the brands, whereas again
personal or the business brand that you can create much cheaper and much more valuable connection
with your audience because you can show your if you were taking personal brands so some expert
some person just a blogger doesn't matter you can create much more connection with your audience
because you're showing them what is going right now in your life you can show them not only some
bit of your personal life or your personal opinion, your personal values, and at the end
this creates the connection with your audience because they are feeling kind of the same as
you. So you are creating some special, again, I will say it again, connection, but it depends
on your role. Maybe you wanted to be a mentor for your audience and they will feel
it so. Maybe you wanted to be a friend with your audience and they will feel it
And it doesn't have to spend years and thousands, millions of euros, dollars for this.
It's very, very available and the same for the business.
For the business, it's even more because it's hard when you're a person, it's easier
to create this kind of intimacy.
I think it's the right word.
But for the business, it can be a bit harder, especially if you are just the brand.
And with social media, you can create it much more easier, just make more posts and show more values.
Taking care about your mental health.
I think there are no, well, even though I'm in social media for a long time, I still struggle
with the same thing and I still compare myself with others.
And the problem is not in the understanding because I understand and many of the girls
understand rationally that this is fake or we are not know the whole story.
But at the same time, emotionally, we are where we still react on this, and that's the main thing.
And I think the only way to really get rid of this is to develop your self-confidence,
because if you are self-confident enough, you just won't compare yourself.
If you are believing in yourself enough, you won't compare, because you know that it's your life,
is the same situation where you are so, and this is how it is so, not other way kind of around.
I think there's this thing, and again, the developing self-confidence is a process,
so you really, yeah, you just work on this every day by different steps,
rather than just, you won't get rid of this feeling at once.
I understand, that's very, very, very wise. And to you at the same time, you said your
mother says that you are talented in different areas and that you are also pursuing things
that are related to design, to social media, you're studying business, going for your
MBA, you are someone who's living now in a different country.
So there are many women who maybe either feel low self-esteem, maybe their parents
did not encourage them or criticize them too much, or maybe they have worry and
anxiety, so they stay in their comfort zone and all their potential is outside their comfort
zone. But maybe they think, oh, if I do it, maybe I will fail and people will criticize
me and that will hurt. What motivates you and gives you the courage to do more, to
put yourself outside of your comfort zone, to risk having haters and people criticize
you? And what's your advice to all the women so they live their potential, even
if they feel some worry and anxiety?
So, I think, again, since you start with something my mom told, I will also answer you with a
phrase which my mom tells me, is that it's something, because it's a bit hard to translate
it in English, but it's something like, not the gods make ceramics in a way that
you do not have to have all the knowledge of the world, or you do not have to be
God to do some activity and to really complete it. So it's easy, since again, if others do it,
so you don't have to be a God, as it says in a way. And I really don't understand this feeling
of even to be scary, yeah, the feeling of scary and being afraid of failure. But with me,
what really recently motivates me. It's a bit in a way negative thing, but I think so, for example,
it is bad now and I have two possibilities. Possibility one, I can do something, I can fail,
but I can win. Possibility two, do not do anything and still will be bad. So with the
first possibility, I have at least 50% chance, at least maybe it's more because you're not very
objective with yourself to really win and to change the situation to a better one.
So maybe it's a good thing to take this risk and to try it out.
And then we'll see, because otherwise it will be just the same.
I love that.
That was very, very wise.
And I agree with it 100%.
And asking you as someone who went to live in Belgium, the culture is different.
some people say that in Belgium as well as parts like Germany people even if you build connections
with them it's never really friendship like you might have back home. How was your experience and
adaptation to a new country? Did you have challenges with culture shock or are you
adaptable and you didn't worry about it? How was your story of adapting to a new place,
new people and new life? With me, I heard about it, that the Belgians are kind of cold, etc. It's
hard to be friends with them, but I didn't experience it so, because everyone when I came
here, everyone was very friendly, our neighbors, they really helped a lot, and then other people
when I met through my career and through my study journey as well, for example,
And they're very friendly. And I can say that for me in Belgium, I even with all this culture and everything, I even developed my personality more.
And it's not just the way that, you know, as they say that when you're going to another country, you're developing more and you're like improving yourself.
It's not only in this way, but in a way that this is where I became more open and more confident and more comfortable with myself.
So, I even feel that I have much more in common with this culture rather with my culture because
in my country sometimes I was, we call it, I think it's called in English correctly,
the black horse, the person which not very suits to the community in a way.
Sometimes I had it and here I feel much more easier and I feel much confident in
myself.
And I'm fine with opening different sides of myself
and to discover more.
And I see that everyone is...
Because this is normal here.
It's not that if you will, I don't know, for example,
I think two years ago, I tried to do braids,
like colorful braids, you know?
And especially for a wise girl,
it was like, wow, what?
And I was fine with doing it here because I knew that people will actually support me trying something new rather than looking at me like on a beard.
And this helps a lot. And the thing is, I think for someone who is moving to another country, the main thing is to, first of all,
I'm sorry. First of all, to not compare your culture with, and you will do this definitely
because it's normal thing, but do not do it like with every single detail like,
oh, but in my country, this or that, you are here. So try just to take it as it is,
enjoy it and like try to like fill it through yourself, like through your mind,
through your body, just experience this culture, this country, these people, rather than
constantly comparing or saying, oh, this is here bad or that bad. After years, you will be really
comfortable here anyways, and you will find some differences, and something will be better,
something, something will be worse, but you just have to take it as it is rather than thinking I'm
not, I will be here, etc. Like the negative mind is also does very much to you. Thank you.
That's very true, very insightful. Thank you so much, Diora. It was my privilege and my honor
to include you in this project, to share your voice and your story in this podcast. I wish
all the success and if people want to connect with you maybe they want to cooperate with you
what can they do with you together and what is the best way for them to find you
and i'll make sure to write your instagram in the episode description
first of all thank you again for having me it's it was it was such a pleasure it was
first experience for me but very very nice friendly and comfortable so i'm very grateful
you for this if in case someone would like to cooperate or just to talk in
case this is I'm also very open to this they can yeah they can text me on
Instagram I think is the easiest way and I'm open to any cooperations
including anything like literally anything if it's if it's possible we
will definitely realize it that's great thank you again thank you thank
Thank you so much.
